Tall hot China guy looking for sub been awhile. HONORED like, YOU MIGHT NEVER BE IN like AGAIN. I am tall with a swimmer's build.
Seeking for wants to find funny, older, sane, stable, and active. Yes, it's spontaneous, but that's what I like as well, as life should be an adventure. What do you do with the pictures. American Werewolf in Spain OK my ideaan international romance experiment Searching for an interesting and beautiful Russian woman (inside and out:) to start for a great friendship with while living both in Moscow and Barcelona. Do you. I'd say you shouldn't be any further south than Dalton, GA unless you're willing to sleep, and no further north than as I fuck up there often.
For men of Asian descent , that means their good looks too often go overlooked. Remember when the TV host laughed at the idea of white women finding Asian dudes attractive?
Yeah, who could forget. Below, 23 guys who are upending ideas about what it means to be attractive and masculine by sheer virtue of their good looks. For part one of this clearly riveting series on hot Asian men, head here. Always remember to stretch swimming imasoulman photographed by ashdo ashtondo. A post shared by Scott Neslage scottneslage on May 16, at 2: The Bridge Series invites a selection of inspiring people to share their thoughts and ideas with the world.
A post shared by J. My SpikeSpiegel look for a wwd feature. A post shared by Ross Butler rossbutler on Mar 30, at And now you've seen my boy-band look. A post shared by Chris Pang pangeerz on Jan 19, at 3: A post shared by David Lim davidbradleylim on Apr 17, at The world premiere of the light of the moon at sxsw will be at the stateside theater tomorrow at Wish I could be there!
A post shared by Conrad Ricamora conradricamora on Mar 11, at 9: A post shared by Kunal Nayyar kunalkarmanayyar on Aug 8, at A post shared by Alex Mallari Jr alexmallarijr on Dec 5, at 9: A post shared by azizansari on Jun 20, at 1: Throwback to my shoot with benjoarwas Such a talented photographer and generous soul. Been a pleasure watching his artistry grow and evolve.
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Opinion HuffPost Personal Videos. Dev Patel is the Internet's boyfriend for good reason. Scott Neslage puts the super in supermodel. Waris Ahluwalia is a social justice fighter and a fashion designer and he looks like this. Here's Ross Butler of "13 Reasons Why" bringing you major bedroom eyes. They took home an award and looked flier than anyone else there.
Chris Pang has been cast in "Crazy Rich Asians". We're crazy happy about that. What, you thought we were going to forget David Lim from "Quantico"?
We're just gonna go ahead and credit all of the "Big Bang Theory's" rating success to babe Kunal Nayyar. Obviously we have to include rapper and fashion god Jay Park. Singer and actor Akanishi Jin is basically a tousled hair god. Adorable, smart, funny, loves carbs -- what's not to love about Aziz Ansari?
Choi Seung-hyun , aka K-Pop star T. This pic of Shahid Kapoor? Proof that too much of a good thing is a very good thing. Daniel Wu kicks ass and takes numbers on "Into The Badlands" -- and looks hella good doing it.
And finally, here's model-slash-athlete Hideo Muraoka. Tattoo Artists Weigh In. It Sells No Meat Whatsoever. A weekly guide to improving all of the relationships in your life.
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Find a similar place near you. A wood, a lake, and some elevation you can dig into for shelter if you must relocate on the fly. At least each spot is easier to survive…LA would be a near-automatic death sentence. SeaTac would be survivable, but only if you got out in time. I cover a huge chunk of this, though not by specific city — just hit up the link and scroll to page 12 in the book, not the PDF , titled: Ah Los Angeles… how I love it sarcasm. Lake Havasu is not easily reached.
I love this one. Jackalopes- My wife thought they were real when I pointed one out mounted on the wall of a restaurant-a fake one of course.. Recently, I have been looking at motor homes. You can pick them up for less than the cost of an acre of land. I will most likely get one, if enough time still remains.
With a motor home, you can keep most of your supplies in it and be ready to hit the road in a moments notice with the ultimate bug out bag on wheels. It can be parked anywhere, and you can select several different sites for backup plans.
Even move between many sites after the SHTF, as required. You can pull a small car or truck along with you, or a trailer full of supplies. With a full tank of gas, they have a good driving range as well.
You can also customize it to fit your needs while you are waiting for it to be called into action. Put a solar panel on it, or whatever. They already come with generators and batteries, and would be relatively cheap to make sustainability without the grid possible. They come with water storage tanks and mini sewer systems. They have bathrooms, showers and a kitchen. They can not be taxed, and afford all of the constitutional protections from the corp allowed for your home, so long as you call it that when you are in it.
And, you can enjoy it before the SHTF by going on camping trips, and other excursions that will prepare you if a bug out is required.
I have spent a lot of the last year looking for the perfect piece of property. Every one of them would come with debt attached, and a payment. They would all require massive amounts of work and money for materials to make them retreat ready and livable, and they are far from home making the time for the work almost impossible to come by.
In the last couple of weeks I have seen several decent motor homes for sale under FRNs. Some appeared to be fairly nice, most had pretty low mileage as well. They can be paid for quickly and owned out right with no corp claim on it. They can be a home anywhere you have to be, or want to be.
In my mind, getting a motor home is the best solution. For safety, if you hear on your radio of troop activity or other problems heading your way, you go down the road the other way and life remains the same except for a different parking place. It has become my goal and top priority to own a motor home in sound mechanical condition within the next four months.
Most states view motor homes, i. Also, in the state where I live, any RV or boat or trailer that one might drive or tow that touches the road will have personal property taxes imposed on it. So, one way around that is to get a pickup truck, or bigger and then purchase the most expensive slide-in truck camper that you can afford. Get as many options as you can afford, even if you might not need to use them all in regular circumstances. These campers do not touch the road, they sit on the back of the truck.
They do not come with a title, they come with a certificate of ownership. They do not have to be registered at the DMV — so,basically, the sleazy, greedy, vulturous politicians really have no way to know you own one.
Oh, and to screw them even further — find a dealer in a nearby state that has no sales tax, and order one from them. So, while you will still have to pay personal property taxes on the vehicle — plus title and registration fees, the camper gives you a way to escape most of the ownership costs of a regular RV.
Granted, living space is not as plentiful and living in one of these for more than a week or two might not be percent fun in a SHTF situation, but the good quality brands are excellent shelter, have all the critical appliances and features and since they are on the back of a truck, are far more maneuverable and easier to deal with when traveling down back country roads.
You can take them anywhere your truck is able to go, and there is no hassle about having to tow a big rig behind you that will hinder your ability to navigate or turn around in tight locations.
It makes you very mobile, but it also makes you a big, fat, moving target. Add in the very limited space you have though it has plenty of room if you do it intelligently , and it should only be considered a last resort, IMHO. You are so correct!
It would be like driving a big Walmart. Food, supplies, shelter, etc, just get rid of the current owners. Then again, there is the potential gridlock on the roads…even if you do think you got out in time. Did you ever try to hide a Sherman tank? And how far can you get on even 25 gallons?
Then you are just another lump along the highway. You can stay more mobile that way. You can always park in a secluded area ahead of time and use that as a bug out location. Steve, ask them what the taxes are for a nonresident, and who will issue you a license? They can only tax what you allow them to.
Declaring yourself a resident is what gives them the jurisdiction to tax. You must remain a nonresident to remain free of the obligations of residency. You can take sewage water and distill to pure standards but you need a power source or have a small one that can be fired with wood. If a person is planning on a BO plan that centers around RVing, they should always have a destination or two or ten, in mind that will give them the availability of water, safety, and 3- wood.
Without wood, and in a long term situation without electricity; life could get very tough and very quickly. Depending on the temperatures outside, a good source of firewood could mean the difference between hunkering down in two or three sleeping bags and eating cold foods, or having warmth and hot foods to help not only the body but also the spirit. There is something about a fire that can make a person feel alive and lift their spirits when all else seems to be doom and gloom.
If there are no tanker shipments, you had better believe the stores will hoarde the underground tanks for themselves.
You can reside full time in motor homes. But How will you drive it if zero driver lic? Good luck when its Impounded first time a cop stops you. Cant guess how costly impound fees will be as compared to reg car or pickups truck are?
But a normal sedan or car is probobly aprox. I too have planned such a move for several yrs now 5yrs or so. Yes cheep ones are plentifull. But as with most all stuf ya gets what ya pays for. If its older expect roof leaks, broke down fridges big cash for new or used to fix it. Like boats nothings cheep in fixes or repairs. Main difference for me is I first wanted a motorhome, but switched to rather get a Fifth wheel, and Seperate puller truck.
With Cat C-7 or 8. But with an acre or a few acres paid off land to park on in two areas expences will be Alot less than a full size crib. Nothing beats ability to start engine, batten down hatches, and Drive away! To location 2 for winter when too cold in location 1. Or all points in between. I think it will be Freedom such as you get with a Harley Bike. But way better as all you own is with you always. Only main down side is if a mob gang tries to hyjack it and You while on the road etc…..
But Thats reason we All Pak lots of loaded Firearms right. Just always travel back rural roads and enjoy scenery and do Not be in a hurry to get anywheres. Avoid large or Medium size citys at all costs! Very Soon I hope! As I lay in my sleeping bag in Zabul Province Afghanistan Rick gave me the book in and predicted the crash of , I was profoundly changed forever after.
Anything that moves will be a target…. I have lived in several states and after being in a new place for a couple of months, if I have not changed my plates, I will be stopped. The local with ask why I have not gotten new plates for that state. What Are the obligations of residency?
Are you suggesting; avoid taxes or, depleat Govermente funding? GC, its like you have been spying on me. Do I welcome it or fear it. Fare well and stay on that plan anyway. I am really confused.
Married, Mobile Home, Tralier Park heaven, underskirt and attachments. Add an inverter and 4 to 6 deep cycle batteries and you got somthin.
Y99 you made me laugh in a good way! We live off grid, in the desert, so I understand all about inverters and deep cells. You all give me great things to think about! Do u know, u can make a fan work on a deep cell? What will we do with our animals? Bravo Brother and welcome to the Nomad Clan. I have two motor homes myself. My 19 foot dodge is my daily driver, thus my get home bag. My 24 foot winnie is my bug out home in case I cannot bug in. Two is one and one is none, I like having options.
I live along the cali coast, so short of a tsunami, I plan to bug in. The Pacific Ocean will provide necessary food and water. Good luck in finding an RV to fit your needs and style,lol. Mac, appears there is a formatting problem. You know I would never ramble in a single paragraph. McVeigh got tripped up by the same thing. In a crisis, any pretense will be used to stop and loot your rig. I overheard a guy tell another guy that if mcveigh went to the UN instead of OK buildg, hed be a real Hero…..
So… I say nothing bigger than a 1 ton van and preferably a crappy looking one at that. Cramped alive is better than cushy dead. I tend to agree with your overall suggestion. We had a 30 foot MH a few years ago. It had all the amenities you brought up. We traveled a few times, a few thousand miles each time and had fun and saw some great sites.
After our adventures, we ended up selling out MH. The 26 footers and up are big and with that size the problems seem to increase exponentially, not to mention, gas mileage is very poor, even with diesels. Our original MH had a gas engine and we were lucky to get 10 mpg at best at certain times.
So, I started looking for a smaller RV that was durable, affordable, dependable, that got good gas mileage. To make a long story short and to cut to the chase, I found one in particular that fit the bill. Great engines but underpowered. Then as the coaches got bigger, so did the engine. Around 88 or 89 they came out with the great V6 3,0 engine.
More power, dependability and good gas mileage; up to 18 mpg. This was in almost perfect condition. However, they can be found for half that price still in great shape. You can tell, when you see one and go inside it. Previous owners took great care. Engine was maintained properly. I trust ours because I know, from my trip to Colorado from the Pacific NW in October, ours is dependable and gets fairly good gas mileage 17 includes driving through some passes.
I have a rack on the back that holds 7 — 5 gallon NATO jerry cans 35 gallons combined with the standard 17 gallon gas tank on board and I can go over miles. I also have mounted panels See here batteries, charge controller and inverter so that we can use some of our appliances and lights without tapping gas in the generator. Basically it truly is a small second home and one that you can depend on to get from point A to Point B and back with comfort and joy.
Ours is presently set up somewhat for off the grid. It could, however, get us out of here in an emergency. How many preppers live in a major city? Should those that do live in the city make a run for it if all hell breaks loose? The reason I say that is, as much as I hate cities and go out of my way to avoid them, if I were living in a city, if I chose the city as my personal landscape, the last thing I would do, if a sudden collapse was unfolding in a short time frame, would be to jump into a car, with a BOB in the back seat, and head for the country.
To anyone reading this who is a city dweller and a prepper. Staying put, in an environment that you know like the back of your hand, even as those around you might be panicking, will give you a better chance of making it through the first phase.
Getting in ones car, truck or RV in the city and going to the country without a specific destination no retreat cabin or friends can be very dangerous. We all already know that. This MH alternative is something I have considered, although at a much more rustic level, i. Admittedly, this would be a hardship, but it would give you optimum mobility and a fighting chance, especially if you bugged out early—and would need 6 months ready made food supply, especially if one had to bug out over winter and need time to get the garden and meat sources underway.
I would NOT get a RV because it is too specialized, and advertises you as a leisure class baby boomer with money and a fat, juicy target. Consider how the Indians could overtake a single covered wagon, even if it were guns vs bows and arrows.
I would want to be able to unhook a trailer and park it and hide it, etc, travel with only my SUV if need be…something harder to do with a full blown RV.
Plus, if I wanted to travel some back roads, a simple trailer would be more manageable. Owning a well provisioned homestead may make you a target over time unless you have numbers of like minded folks you can trust in your community.
Even if you are rural, gangs may be seeking the protection and safety of remote hideouts and you may be faced with more than you bargained for if the SHTF drags out for months or years. I have only myself and 2 others, so a solo homestead bug out location makes less sense for me.
Nevertheless, it seems everyone around me…white collar professionals especially , think I am a nut and gloom and doomer. In my mind, too many variables to plan ahead and pick one definite place to be ahead of time. I would rather have some flexibility.
If one bugs in too long in a bad place, may not be able to bug out at all later. I certainly understand those who say hunker down and let the first wave of the storm blow by before making your move. My thoughts are to provision a trailer and keep it in a storage facility on the outskirts of the city if you live in a big city. Check out Quartzsite, AZ. There are thousands of acres of BLM land that you can dry camp on.
I think that includes waste dumping priveleges. No water or power. The sun always shines so a few solar panels on the roof and LEDs for lighting will suffice.
Car shows, RV shows, swap meets, rock hounding. Drop in at the Quartzsite Yacht Club for a burger and a beer, and join the nationally recognized yacht club. Their motto is Long Time No Sea. My lady and I were ther for a month early this year and had a ball. If there is a mass exodus from your area, I am not sure an RV will get very far. If it is like the evacuation preceeding hurricanes, get out waaay early or forget it.
Otherwise you will likely be stuck in traffic. In Phoenix, for example, there is really only one direct way out of town if you want to head North. Two other ways will get you to water and woods but all of the roads would be jammed in an emergency; as they are during a long weekend.
Personally, from my experience here, small towns are great and locals are friendly. There is lots of water in Arizona … and plenty of shade and shelter … if you know where it is at.
Chances are that the general population here, who have not explored the countryside, do not know where these resources are located.
Recon your wider area so that you are familiar with the locations of these resources if evacuation becomes necessary. Gasoline will be in short supply during a true SHTF. At a minimum make sure you have a good bicycle with baskets , a good back pack, and a couple solar panels for that camper too! But to tell you the truth, Nature would have to be really clear in her method of getting my attention.
I know the landscape and I know somewhat my neighbors and neighborhood. If you had 4 wheel drive you could go by Lake pleasant and take Crown King road, but as with all bug out plans there could be snags, have to know the route before hand, wet roads,plenty of places to be ambushed etc etc.
If you don;t mind me asking where abouts are you in AZ? Today I am in Palm Valley. Someone in a camper and a attached trailer with preps could live in that area indefinitely. If you are a member of LDMA you have another advantage others would not have. I know how to get to Prescott, by way of the but have only been here 3 years.
So glad to be out of CA. Any info would be appreciated. A motor home is not a bad idea. I live in a very rural area with quite a few acres, but the house is close to the road. The main problem with a motor home, that I can think of, is when you are in transit. Had gal fresh water could go days between dumps and refill. Solar to keep batteries charged. Looking for another one now. That is one of my plans. I have a camper and a F It is not ideal, but if there is a partial collapse depression where the bank is taking the land and home that you rent property taxes you can either live in a box or have an actual home.
It may not be everyones idea of a house, but how many folks during the great depression would have loved to have a camper? My struggle is keeping prep supplies in it. I live in an area where the temps get hot. I dont like depleting my shelf life. I may have to get a power pole so I can keep my ac on in the warm months.
I am also working on a larger fuel tank for the truck, so I can go miles without a refill. The drawback is that if it is a road warrior type of SHTF, you dont want to be on the road. My goal would be to find a place to postition it shortly after the collapse. Even during a partial collapse you can legally stay up to two weeks at a fed campground.
Have you considered what you would do if there is an EMP? I can not fathom a purpose for exposing myself and my family to clear lines of fire on a roadway. We will hike through bushes and brambles, crawl through culverts and black berry patches, we will travel in the shadows.
Roadways are not in my SHTF plan. Northern Id sounds great to me how do I get in touch. We are preppers for several years and my husband is a EMT licensed, I am a teacher plus we are farmers from way back. I canned qts this past summer and put in the freezer mucho stuff.
How can I reach you? I also happen to be a Registered Nurse, former Air Force medic, and former military if you are interested in certain skill sets. Spokane is NOT a good place to relocate to…higher crime every day, actually a lot of gang activity and Snappers. The military, the government, knows all about those things.
And they will be ready and waiting. Anyone not already at their location , for those lucky enough to have a location, its going to be very tough getting there. People dont realize there will be more than just the general population to deal with. You will see the worst in people if something major happens. The government, especially this administration, will most likely try to corral everyone or kill them.
They get off on it. The problem with knocking out Govt. Lines of drift, yeah I worry about that one a lot. I was raised on a homestead were we had to pump water and grow our own food and she never was. I know God provides but maybe that provision is through hard work tilling the soil. Ryback is basically right. The Obama and FEMA will kindly in return provide you and your family with three small meals a day, a few square feet for your family to live in, and eventually either a ride or a lovely walk to another larger area where you can stay at their expense in tents.
You will be separated from most of your family. Then when FEMA runs out of resources, you will either ride or march to a labor camp. Listen up, you preppers. You think that escaping to the rural areas is going to work? Let me tell you. You will not be welcome. You will find nothing but the ammo you think to stock to kill your fellow citizens.
And even if you do win by overtaking your rural neighbors you will have destroyed the key to your very survival. You will eliminate yourselves for all eternity.
I will even cook you a very special bon voyage meal. Terrible people, wake up. How many of your own desperate fellow Americans are you willing to destroy to save your pathetic lives? You should come and work on our land and get your fair portion. I say to hell with Americans if you choose to be this way. Since I will have anticipated the foolish actions that you plan, you will not find a dwelling, clean water, or any livestock.
Such a cop out. I firmly believe in being prepared for natural disasters, and helping people out. But you are foolish indeed to trade your dignity and honor for such a cheap price. Eat the feathers of my chickens that I killed and walk in their spoiled blood after I have thrown their rotting carcasses into the wells and rivers.
You will eat grass like cows, you will eat tree bark, you will eat your own children. Such is the nature of your ignorance. You think what I say is crazy?
Why, then, should I respect you? You have declared yourselves enemeies of the American people, against each other on a level that makes the civil war look like a harmless board game. Indeed, these beliefs that you hold so dear make you unworthy of the life that you were so lucky to have bestowed upon you. You will make this country into the worst place on the planet.
A nation of thugs. Start working WITH your neighbors. There is no time to waste. Form Partnerships for the sake of your grandchildren. Are you not willing to do that? You will most certainly do it out of NEED the way you all think, but by then, you will have destroyed the very things that will sustain you. You can change things NOW.
You will eat garbage first. Prepare wisely, work with your community. There are plenty in want right NOW. I doubt that you care. Try to get over yourselves and see the big picture. Your children will suffer, and their children. So easy to destroy, and so hard to rebuild. Prepare to endure hardship, and work with your community.
Otherwise, the powers that be will WIN and it will be at the most dear cost to yourselves. In fact, I think I will relocate my progeny, and stay behind to ensure your total destruction since I have nothing else to lose. Will I teach you to raise local seed? Will I teach you anything? I will show you things that will sustain you only to suffer a longer death for threatening my life and having so little regard for life in general. You will not kill me AND take over my well, stream, or any other body of water or anything else of use.
Dark ages style warfare. It is all a matter of prepraredness and resolve, right? You need to do some serious rethinking. I have profited from your irrational conclusions and plans already. We KNOW all the places. And where the hell do you think you are going to fill up? Damn the day that American military would kill Americans. Oh, the Harley guys? With YOU as the ball? We are really good with traps and running targets.
I have some surprises for you! Oh, what a wonderful world! It is by collaboration that we have acheived so much, and you will acheive your own deaths the same as by suicide. Look past the end of your nose, consider how you want the future to be.
Throw some money at your rural neighbors, they might plant an extra row just for you. How much will you pay for a gallon of water? If you can find any? Since you are so ruthless, what option would you have? And what possible incentive do you think you can offer? I never thought that the average American could be so conned into belieiving such lies and think so destructively.
I will see you as hostile disease carrying invaders and parasites. Change your attitude, change your beleifs, build relationships with LOCAL people that can provide for your community. Invest in them collectively.
Then, if an area is harmed by natural disaster, we will be able and willing to accomodate them, or maybe you. We have already made the choice between convenience, money, and cable TV in favor of a better way of life, at least to our minds. Who are you going to call on your worthless cell phone? You are going to call OUR local police?????
Take a chance, invest in your own communities. Then one community can help another. Where will you buy more? They can pin a running rabbit straight through to the ground and I have the pics to prove it. Just the way they want you. Ever thought about asking a local famer to plant you a year or three of say, corn? Ever thought about spending your week end working on a leased co-op?
They really are lies that you have been taught to tell yourselves. So go ahead and fight amongst yourselves. My family has been here before the revoutionary war, and thanks to some native americans my butt can tell you to piss up a rope and suck it dry! That was a very thoughtful, passionate post! I appreciate your reminding us all of community and how we need to look at our fellow man as neighbors rather than adversaries.
And also bringing up what we may each have to offer the community instead of relying only on self. Thank you for the slap in the face!! Karen; Good for you Im happy for you, but you better be able to protect what you have. The military might overreact to murder, oops, sorry, self defense. Hey Karen, why chicken out after blasting everyone? How neighborly is that? Why not share your chickens without poisoning them? In the end, stereotypes might give you an idea of traits that people from a certain place might have, but they cannot define an individual.
Some of the stereotypes about the Chinese even contradict themselves! Think of the martial artist versus the nerdy guy. When two people in this world find each other and have a connection. All the life experience, culture, prejudices etc. But what happens later on is about the individual themselves and how they deal with them. Sure, you need to learn the language and it takes time. But in China, I know people who have been here for years and years, speak fluent Chinese and barely have any Chinese friends.
I remember going to a music festival here in Beijing once and seeing hundreds of cool Chinese people. I said to a friend: Something similar probably happens in Chinese communities overseas. Why should I have to teach someone how to act? These are things he should learn as a child and no one should have to be the mother of a grown man. If an adult is doing things like these, he will never change because it is too late as those behaviors are ingrained deep inside him.
There is nothing shallow, immature, or superficial about expecting a grown adult to have common decency. I went out with a Chinese guy once who spit on the floor at KFC. I recoiled in disgust and he acted like nothing was wrong. I calmly explained that we were in a restaurant where people are eating and doing that was totally unacceptable. He said okay and then spit on the floor again less than three minutes later.
I got up and walked out immediately. These are the things that civilized people learn as children. It is not too much to ask for someone to have decent public manners.
I hope you are not going to get all over-sensitive now and start lashing out at foreign countries, or foreign cultural standards, or something like that. The things I mention are a problem.
A very big problem. I hope the foreign women looking for Chinese men can find the Chinese men who do not do those behaviors. But it will not be easy. I know no one wants to talk about it. The only answer is a lot more education about manners and hygiene. True, not all Chinese guys spit, hock and do other disgusting things. But a lot of them do, here in China. If she really did go out on a date with a Chinese guy who did that, it indicates she is not contaminated by bad stereotypes and probably people were unfair to her.
I did notice an excess of political correctness here. But it is HUGE on a personal level. The hocking IS gross. Part of it, I think is a generational gap. When I see the spitting etc. I rarely see the younger men doing it.
Kindly do not attribute words to myself that are extrapolation and projection of your own personal sensitivity and level of maturity, irrespective of your age. My experience is that personal attraction and curiosity does the darndest things to people, often resulting in the unlikeliest of partnerships and friendships. She has a primness to her that I initially found endearing though occasionally insufferable, but which later mellowed as we dated since she and I came to appreciate our differing perspectives.
By contrast my ex-German girlfriend proved most tediously argumentative and overly politically, which while initially intellectual stimulating, became wearily frustrating especially when all I wanted was a simple cuddle after a long day. And so on it goes. Of course not, for it reflected the formation process of my own preferences, yet conversely also the slow erosion of my prejudices as I learned to see people beyond the superficial and appreciate them for what they are and their potential.
In all cases I was glad that I overcame my initial dislike and got to know every complex one of them better for what they are. So the question is what prompted you to go out on a date with him in the first place? To clarify something, I have not said that ALL Chinese men publicly spit, hock, nose pick, butt dig, have stinky breath, smoke, shoot snot rockets, or cough without covering their mouths.
I made it a point to say that not ALL do those things. But the sad truth is that MANY do those things, including a lot who are in their 20s and 30s.
I guess they pick it up from older men because they do not know better. For the record, I have even hung out with Western educated Chinese guys who did not do those things when they were in other countries, but reverted back to such behavior when they returned to China.
Give me a break! It is called will power. They are too lazy to control themselves or teach to others anything proper. This is not an attack on China either. People know about the main stereotype of the French. Many folks in places like India are known for not being attentive to body odor.
I am sure there are other areas in the world with stinky breath and other kinds of problems. But this blog is specifically about things that can keep Western women and Chinese men apart so I am addressing one of the biggest issues.
Wanting all people in every country to have a basic standard of cleanliness and manners is not superficial. It is something that should be normally expected. Please do not hide behind cultural differences because saying that is an excuse for not acting. All people with some education should teach those who do not know. If someone spits by your feet, speak up.
If someone coughs in your face, speak up. SARS was a perfect opportunity for a mass education campaign to stamp out spitting, hocking, and uncovered coughing.
A-H1-N1 is about to present another perfect opportunity. Will China step up and seize the initiative while the epidemic rages in full force? Leave the excuses behind! I agree that, unfortunately, there are a lot of Chinese men with undesirable habits — spitting, smoking, hocking, etc.
It certainly is a barrier to relationships. The many bad apples out there will often blind us to those one-in-a-million guys who really do exist in China. I have met some extraordinary men in China — men who were more gentlemanly, gentle and caring than anyone I ever dated in the US and, I might add, men who do not smoke, spit, hock, have bad breath, or even drink.
If I had decided that all men in China were disgusting, I would never have given myself the opportunity to know them, which would have been an incredible loss.
As for the change you mention — yes, it is important to demand change, and I hope China changes everyday. Yet keep in mind that China is a very large country with shockingly large gaps between the wealthy and poor. And on the other hand, being wealthy in China can often be an obstacle to change. In some cases, these people even have no shame at all I have seen government officials and elites, all men, who once talked blatantly about their mistresses and lewd sexual behavior right in front of me, at the dinner table.
People in China need to reclaim a sense of shame regarding their behavior in public, on many levels. Everyone tells me to get a Chinese boyfriend, but in reality, it seems that very few are open to that idea. Which is a shame, because I certainly am. Thanks for stopping by and posting a comment! Susan, The first and second comment are not correct at all. Good luck to you! May i just add one more point to what Susan had mentioned about Chinese men, a lot of us are good chef at home too: Food is a such important part of chinese culture that cooking is not just the responsibility of women.
I bet most of the chinese men feel the same about you. Grow up, you have a long way to go. When I was 22, moving to America was not an easy quest for me, I was considered skinny at lbs. I could not get most American girls to go on a date with me. My point is, people will always have their first impression from your outer appearance, and sometimes, you might just need to let them have it before they even get a chance to know the real you.
I can say from my personal experience, even after my transformation on my image the macho look , many white women still keep their distance from me. This is mostly because of the race issue. For some reason, more white men can easily accept Asian women than a white women can accept Asian men. I can accept racism but I refuse to believe Chinese men are less than western men in any way.
Not even handsome vs. If I could get a Chinese guy to make a move I would be so happy. Part of it is they seem intimidated. As to other expats guys! The second night I was in China, one guy asked me if I would date a Chinese guy and when I said yes, he accused me of having a fetish for small penises.
What about the rampant adultery? Not only is adultery fairly common, it seems almost socially accepted and mandated. Has this been a problem for any of the couples? Perhaps it also happens that plenty of racism in China exists toward foreigners living in the country. Can anyone explain it maybe they have already? Maybe, is it due to the lack Asian men presence in the media? Re Andrea, the problem of rampant adultery is not true even though the things appeard.
At least the mainstream culture can not accept it. These historical wounds still haunt many Chinese mentally. What Stan said is true, I believe most Chinese men have hard time to let women pick up their tab on a date.
Casual dating with foreign girls is just not common in China, on top of that, i think basic communication can be another issue, how many foreign girls can speak fluent chinese and how many chinese men can speak fluent english in china?
This issue alone can eliminate almost majority of the potiential dates. I also think that bias against asian men do still exist which makes the matter even more complicated, because it becomes more than just about dating, it becomes a issue of race and chinese certainly do not take it lightly.
On the mistress issue, I have to agree with Steven Chao. While I have come across some circles of men in China where mistresses are in the picture — these are often the powerful bosses, or officials, or men in high positions, usually 40, 50 years or older. Not your typical guy, and certainly not the kind of guy most of us would end up dating or marrying anyway.
Yes, this discussion is interesting. But I still think that the main obstacle here is how closed the Chinese society is. Because in the end it ends up playing a role in the language barrier as well. And, by not engaging very much with a lot of Chinese people, the mixing just becomes a bit more complicated.
I agree Chinese society is closed. But if this were the main reason why there are so few Chinese men dating or marrying foreign women, you would see the same pattern with Chinese women dating or marrying foreign men.
Still, it is possible to overcome the barriers — and doing so largely depends on how you approach your experience in the country, and the kinds of experiences you have. When I first came to China, I knew almost no Chinese — just a few survival phrases, and basic numbers. But I was curious about China, and interested to learn. In the process, I made some amazing Chinese friends, who spoke English and became my own teachers — teaching me about the culture around me.
If you live in China as a foreigner, you always have the opportunity to have contact with the culture. Of course I meant my experience in China. You seem to put the blame on foreigners who stay in their comfort zones. But these people still hang out with foreigners much more than with Chinese. Actually, we accept them as one of our own. So yes, I do put some of the blame on the Chinese society.
But I am not blind to our flaws and I did have a very good welcome when I lived in Germany. I apologize if I sounded as though I was putting so much blame on foreigners. I can understand where you are coming from, given your experience in Brazil, and observing foreigners integrating quite flawlessly into the culture.
You are right that it is not easy in China for foreigners. I too have had moments of alienation in China. And perhaps I am an anomaly — having family ties to the country brings me so much closer to it. If you put an effort into it I believe the Chinese society is pretty open.
But I kind of have a good starting point: I live in a totally Chinese area in Beijing, no other westerners is living here. I have been very welcomed here. Yet, the great majority of their friends seems to be foreign. It makes it much easier for a foreign guy to chat up a Chinese girl in a random social setting e. On the other hand, some Westerns girl would need a real connection to a guy to fall for him.
That requires a lot of interaction. Point being, it just decreases the chances a western girl has of meeting those amazing Chinese guys out there. This is a complex issue, and all factor raised play a role in each individual case. As it has been pointed out in other comments, some really have a problem with feeling superior to the Chinese. I think one of the reasons that western women are often thought to be rich, even when they are actually not, is because they are typically a lot more exposed to the consumerism that is dominant in western culture.
By that I mean they tend to spend their money more generously and liberally than their Chinese counterparts. Fresh-off-the-boat Chinese FOBs, e. And they expect their girlfriends maybe not girlfriends, but certainly their wives to be economically prudent, too. I know for a fact that I would not be able to independently afford a marriage with any of a number of sorority girls that I know on this campus, even if I could secure the highest paying job available for a normal college graduate.
Another problem that I have encountered is religion. When I came to the states, I landed in a historically white fraternity in a state right in the Bible belt. Methodist, Baptist, Catholicism, Presbyterianism, Mennonite, etc. Even a Jewish professor tried pretty hard at one time to sell me his theology, and I thought Jews always kept their religion private from non-jews.
A lot of protestant Christian groups on campus deliberately and actively target FOB Chinese students, which can be quite disturbing and annoying.
On the other hand, for a lot of people here, atheism is rather controversial, to say the least. So it just never worked out seriously with any girl of religious convictions. And those ladies who are sufficiently secularist are usually too smart to involve themselves with fraternity boys.
You say something about Western consumerism. I have to say that many a Westerners has been shocked about the materialism of China. About religion, that depends on the place. You have to understand the culture of the place you are in. I think one big reason you see so few Chinese men with foreign women is what that taxi driver alluded to. At least that fear is what stops a lot of Chinese guys from trying a relationship with a foreign woman.
Please keep up the great posts! Great to hear from another Western woman who has discovered the joys of marriage to a Chinese man! When you find the right guy, they really can make exceptional partners, for all of the qualities you described all fitting my husband as well.
It said 27 percent of mixed marriages comprised of Chinese men and foreign women — up from a few years before that. More than 60 percent said that it is normal to see mixed couples and 35 percent said that for a Chinese man it is very romantic to marry a foreign woman. The newspaper did not provide information as to the men women ratio among the more than 10, interviewed. Until several years ago 90 percent of the mixed couples were composed of a Chinese woman and a foreign man. Now the percentage of the unions of Chinese men and foreign women has increased to 25 percent of the total.
Unfortunately these marriages do not seem to stand the test of time and according to a poll carried out in Shanghai 60 percent of the mixed marriages celebrated in the period have ended with divorce. In the same period marriages in China increased by 2. Thanks for linking my blog! Yes, I am the one and the same Jessica who you corresponded with way back in … I guess it was ?
My husband is not my then-boyfriend, but a guy I met in quite a few years later. I use workaround methods, but it just adds an extra level of hassle. However, I do hope you stop by my blog once in awhile and keep in touch. It is difficult to socialise between races.
Expats and locals stick to their own enclaves. If they do meet , love can happen. Racism comes only when family and friends frown on the relationship. I am a Chinese guy who currently living in America. I can to the US when I was 16 years old, my mother married a fat, and extreamly unattrictive bold head White guy, so we could come o the US. At that time I used to only like Chinese girls cause I grow up there and watch all the Chinese movies and film where Chinese girls are beautiful.
I never even thought of liking White girls by then, cause I never even seen one. I watch hollywood movie and start to accept White beauty standard. But then after that I start to get a bit lonely cause Asian girls in America never even liked me, some Asian girls told me that I am good looking which I also aggree, but they only wants to be friend. While most other Asian girls are SO mean. I also start to get all the Racisim bullsh!
That really pissed me off. Two years later, my mom divorced her fat husband lol. She start to dating again. I thought great, mom should date a Chinese guy who will have our values and traditions. But she did not, she dated another fat white guy cause she cannot find a good looking white guy. I asked her why? She did not say, but I was smart enough to find out that she hates Asian guys and was totally white washed by American media that Asian guys suck!
So I also changed. Ever since then I start to like non-Asian girls particullary White girls. But right now, I have to stay foucs on school. My comment on American white girls are: Most White girls in US do not like Asian gusy. However, the reason why Asian guys dont dig White girls is due to the lack of media promotion.
Off course they do not want to see Asian guys getting their women cause there are already competition from Black and Hispanic guys. A lot of White girls are into the Asian man sterotypes. That many of them are turn off by us without even know us. Please dont believe in those crap, I am Asian guy and I dont have those nasty sh! But it still hurts to hear all those stuffs. I think I am kinda mentally ill right now. Slipknot, thanks for sharing your experience. I was really blown away by your story, and am so sorry to hear that you were mentally scarred on some level.
But deep down, it really is a double standard. In fact, a few weeks ago I saw a commercial here in the US — I think it was for chewing gum — and it showed two Asian guys living in Scotland with Scottish accents.
Media is not to blame for not letting Asian guys get with white girls, but movies do set the tone. We need more ambitious directors, producers and actors to put in some hotter scenes or at the very least a romance. And we need more hunky Asian heroes to help lead the way. But the bigger question is: What about all the other groups in America? I think most Asian guys are just too timid, nice and kind to get what they want.
You will definitely get rejected a few times. So does everyone else. You just might find the girl of your dreams, have 8 kids, then get a prime-time tv reality show.
So from one Asian guy to all you other Asian guys who are or are thinking about whining: I met him through some British Hong Kong Chinese friends of mine.
None of my friends Chinese or otherwise had any problem with my boyfriend, nor did my family. What I did notice however is that when we were out, we got almost dirty looks from non British Chinese people. These kind of looks only ever came from Chinese people. We swap e-mails a few times a year.
I would also point out that this phenomenon exists in Japan as well. I studied Japanese at university and have lived in Japan. While a student in Japan, I noticed many romances between Japanese girls and foreign men, but very few the other way round.
I prefer someone to challenge me. This is maybe cultural. I have met Japanese men I was attracted to, but as yet no romance has ever ensued. Jocelyn, here is an artical written by a Swedish girl. Her reasons are bias. But it is interesting to read. She is trolling, if you have time to read most of her posts you will find out.
She says Chinese men are not tall. LoL, yes in ShangHi. Cause ShangHI men are southern Chinese. But in Norther China. Man are much taller, close to 5. The same thing apply to White guys. Spanish, Italian, Frence, and Portugal men are not that tall, average about 5.
So, obviously this girl named Jonna is not so smart. She also talked about Chinese men are fememine, WTF. ShangHi is an old emperial city long been fed up all the western propaganda.
Men there tend to think that they are inferior. And girls offtehn take adavantages of it and make their BF do things like carry their hand bags, and even tie their shoes. But this do not apply to Northern and West Chinese men. I for one will never do those things. Again, it shows how shallow Jonna is. The current Frence president Nicolas Sarkozy is only 5.
And Napoliean is only 5. Yet no one makes fun of them, oh yeah. The Frence are European, and European men are might tall and strong Sorry to say this, I mean no offence. Anyway, the apperance of a man is important but his personiality and his intellengence are also important. I hope people dont just judge us based on apperance. However, like Chinese people. Nothing is perfect, everything has its downside like every coin has two sides.
Chinese men like me are very hard working, smart, faimily orenated, have high values, taught to be loyal, and learned how to be a good father and take good care of our parants when they get old.
The down side of us, at least for Chinese men in China is that they do not have a lot of proper manner like spitting, chocking, hocking, and nose picking. Because my mother always telling me how BAD White girls are like they are not loyal, have no ethics, blah blah blah. However, it has its good sides such as clean enviorment, safe street, and great Universities.
Its bad sides are: People always make sterotypes such as Black guys are stupid, white guys have smaller penis compare to black guys, Asian guys are nerds, Mexcian guys are all gangsters…… These things divide American people and greatly hurt the national unity. I just hope one day Coungress would pass laws to ban all sterotypes and Punish people who create them regardless of what race they are.
Its good sides are: It has great infurstructure such as high way, air port, hospitals, and Universities which make living standard high and safe. I wish people especially girls also see the good sterotypes about Chinese men instead of just the negative ones.
Perhaps interracial, international dating and marriage should be expected to be rare in the first place. Here is an article that may answer the latter of the two questions. Biologically speaking, isolated populations do better at evolving traits that are adaptive to the local environment. Reproductive barrier is a necessary condition for genetic diversity, and ultimately speciation.
We would all be ethnic mud. Just like inbreeding is usually a bad thing, widespread interracial breeding, which is exactly the other extreme on the spectrum, is probably not good as well. I am in a committed relationship with a Chinese man, and I am an American white woman. We make similar amounts of money and after much argument he agreed to let me pay a few times. We discuss politics, flaws in Chinese society, flaws in American society, love, sex, you name it we can talk about it.
Our biggest problem is that I will not stay in China, and he is reluctant to come to America. He suspects, I think rightly, that as soon as he is a Chinese immigrant in America it will be difficult for him to get a decent job. So, in the long term I am a little worried on how we will deal with this problem when I leave. And, perhaps this is a tad inappropriate but since the topic has been broached, his penis size is above average.
Our sex life has no problems. I think white women intimidate many Asian men. If you look in the above comments, the Chinese-American man who had confidence had no problem getting women. I knew a few Asian-American men in high school who cleaned up, one was even a total player landing a string of white women. So, while there may be racism in both cultures involved I think the biggest problem is confidence on the part of the Asian men. Prior to my current wife, I have a Canadian Girl friend, who I am her first Chinese Boy Friend, I guess she was in love with me, while we are together, she has done some research and show me how the media protrait the Chinese man, basically in negative way, and how she think the misconcept should be corrected.
When I broke up with her because of my current wife We married two years later , her asked if I have found a Chinese girl to replace me now, when I told her is a Swiss, she was shock, her first reaction was — How can a Western Women fall in love with a Chinese However, she then immediately correct the statement as herself doing exactly the same.
So what if the white women reject you — is that the only race you can date? There are other colors besides white. You might be surprised. Well, how often, if ever, do you see a black woman in China? I personally lived there for more than 18 years, six years in Beijing. I can count on two hands all the black women that I had ever ever seen in Beijing in all those years, all of whom were strongers to me, and most of whom were athletes that I spotted during the Olympic games.
And I am yet to encounter a black woman outside the capital. But I used to meet white women in Beijing almost every other day, and was personally familiar with perhaps half a dozen of them.
If we are to limit our discussion to the US, it should not be surprising to see five or six times more Asian-White couples than Asian-Black couples, just because of the demographic make-up: There are simply more whites than blacks in the US. If you take socio-economic factors into account, it becomes even less likely for Asian men to meet black women, bacause the gap between Asians and blacks is greater than that between Asians and whites. The cold reality is that all people everywhere, of all races, throughout history, just tend to marry within their own socio-economic classes.
Maybe that is wrong. But would you marry an illiterate child-prostitute with AIDS? I really wants to be your friend, i have a chinese boyfriend for 2 years already, but he went crazy. I wish you guys all the happiness in the world. I never said that I did not find Black women not attractive.
I do find Hispanic and Black women attractive. But I had a lot more success with White girls. In high school I had many success.
SO Marie you do not need to feel bad, Asian born in American will have few problems accepting black women. Marcia, just tell your boyfriend you love him and get married then all problem will be solved. Trust me this works.
Marcia, your boyfriend is shy because he got all fed up by Hollywook BullCrap. He lacks confident to love his white girlfriend. But he will have no problem to hold hand with a Chinese girl. However, you do not need to worry. Why not marry him and move him to United States then you will not have these problems. Despite me living in the U.
Despite this, we have overcome much and love each other. And yes, we do get alot of looks while in China, and there are alot more foreign men with Chinese women than the reverse. Also China is not as wealthy as the United States and other western countries. However this is not the main reason. So you now know the main reason. The main thing we need to focous on is sports, if we can do well in sports then we will become much stronger and much more confident then our image will change.
But Yi it is changing now. You know the recession hit western world hard and many Chinese women lost their interets in western men.
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