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Ever wanted your own missed connection

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Some of the most celebrated love stories in Western culture start with missed connections. Romeo and Juliet's story begins when he spies her from across the room. Prince Charming's encounter with Cinderella sends him banging on doors and trying to squeeze strangers' feet into her slipper. Craigslist's Missed Connections have captured that human impulse for 15 years.

Situated between the Casual Encounters and the Rants and Raves sections on the popular listings website, Missed Connections float the full spectrum of human desire from the carnal to the creepy, the sensual to the sullen.

And yet it persists. The appeal of Missed Connections is not romantic, per se. Sure, on the surface, the postings hint at a romance that could have been, a meet-cute deferred by chance. But the more of them you read, the more you find that they're not about love or even lust so much as they're about longing.

They are an opportunity to reflect on the past, to clarify needs, to express desire — in short, to relive a single moment in order to gain something new. That's why we're drawn to both reading and posting them after all these years. At least that's what we found after speaking to Sarah, Marques, Sam and Yemar.

Here's why Missed Connections still matter. Sarah's studio space is tight and cluttered. All around the tables are hand-coiled sculptures, amorphous vase-like figures with manikin feet and hands jutting out from inside of them. Margaret," she tells me, "the patron saint of childbirth.

Sarah, 23, has a wiry frame hidden beneath an oversized white tee, kind eyes and orange hair reminiscent of Jell-O. In November, Sarah ended a three-year relationship that was always on and off. The day of the breakup, she was stewing at work, thinking about the relationship and what went wrong. So she decided to take a walk. On this particular day, the city was just settling into fall. I was just dumbfounded and afterward I couldn't stop thinking about her.

It was this short moment, but it has such a powerful impact on me. I felt like I was walking on air. Sarah is not what I expect someone who posts on Missed Connections to be like. She laughs and smiles often, making prolonged eye contact. She's a realist about dating in New York City, admitting that for the most part, it sucks. It's not that I necessarily think everyone who posts is some sleazy stalker or lonely creep.

Sarah, on the other hand, says that when she reads the listings, she always kind of imagines herself. Even though her post never reached the person was intended for, that's not the point. The missed connection was a glimpse into the future, a moment she says made her aware that "life will move on," she tells me. I'm still thinking of her, this fictional person. She's not even real anymore.

If Sarah were to see her blue-haired angel again, she would would say something, or at least that's what she would like to think. She's almost confident she would. Or maybe, she laughs, she could post another Missed Connection. Marques' downstairs neighbors in Brooklyn love techno music. The living room vibrates a low frequency as he sets two cups of tea on the table. Twenty-seven but with a much younger appearance, Marques recently moved from Tucson, Arizona, to New York to pursue a career in writing, but he currently pays the bills with a day job at an upscale shoe store on the Upper West Side.

And I guess that's what sparked me. I knew I was going to write something. It does not surprise me that Marques is a poet, or that he plans to use his Missed Connection post in an upcoming book of his work.

At one point he compares Missed Connections to a message in a bottle. He's a romantic, one of those who are keenly aware of how little love exists in the world and how much he has to give. That's what connects him to the rest of the people who post on the listings, he says.

That's what I see when I read Missed Connections. Marques is not shy about his emotions, and he speaks with a sort of dated sentimentality that's rare to find in people his age. In the way he describes meeting "the girl with the beanie hat", it's obvious he was taking stock of every moment, the way she smiled and looked at him. When he talks about her, it's with the sort of distant-eyed look of someone who's lost something that he still remembers but will never regain.

I remind him that the girl works around the corner from his workplace. The connection is not missed, just unpursued for now. You can do this. He theorizes that others who post may also be trying to build themselves up, to become the kind of people who can say what they mean out loud. It hasn't been easy, but I have learned to accept myself. I sometimes feel very distant from humanity as a whole. It was a great bonding experience. Before I left, I scribbled down some contact information and a cute note, hoping he would get in contact with me the next morning.

I felt that he put in a great deal of effort for our encounter to happen and what I did was extremely rude. I didn't want to meet someone new. This man made me feel safe, secure, happy, interested, special, carefree and, most of all, beautiful.

This was a learning experience more for him for than me, but he put so much effort into having a good time with me that I respected him so much. I had extremely high hopes and decided to post my Missed Connection so I could return the experience. This was my first time posting in the Missed Connections section. Most of them have been pretty lackluster, like 'Hey' or 'Wanna be friends? I realized that I posted an ad looking for someone I had a one-night stand with.

It has led me to understand just how in need of love I really am and also how little love there is in my life. They met on MySpace, if that helps you understand how long Yemar, now 28, has known Anthony. They were both in high school when they started talking, back when Anthony was a little more "preppy" and Yemar was more "goth," by his account. They still had plenty in common, including a love of video games, and they both lived in New York. What began as simple online flirting blossomed into an eight-year relationship.

When I meet Yemar, he has just gotten off work at his dog-walking job. He's a big guy, but it's the bleached hair and the piercing in the center of his lip that draw the most attention. He's wearing a black hoodie and a pin of a manga character, Sergeant Keroro, on his chest. When I ask him about Anthony, he doesn't answer immediately, pursing his lips then explaining slowly. As the pair's relationship grew, they would hang out with Yemar's sister in Greenwich Village or walk by the pier, holding one another for warmth.

Even Yemar's mother, who refuses to accept that he is gay, knew about them and liked Anthony. They haven't spoken in almost three years. Yemar and Anthony had a huge fight, "the biggest one we've ever had," Yemar says. The fight came at a tense time for Anthony. He had been battling cancer for several years and began pushing people away, including his family. Yemar had actually proposed to Anthony in , and he yes. But a year later, while chatting online, Anthony let slip that he was HIV positive, a fact he claimed he told Yemar the year before but that Yemar says was new information.

Looking back, Yemar says he jumped to conclusions too quickly and lashed out on Anthony. Yemar hadn't read Missed Connections before.

It's his first time posting, and he still hasn't received any responses. But he's exhausted any other resources he had, including friends of friends and Facebook. At this point, he's just waiting, hoping that someone will see the post and pass on his message.

Yemar makes sure to remind me that he is not looking for a relationship with Anthony again. Above all else, he's worried about his friend's health, about whether he's getting better.

I just want to be his friend. He understands me more than anyone I've ever been with. I want to start all over. The fleeting moments that inspire Missed Connections can leave a lasting impact. Jim Buckmaster, the CEO of Craigslist and creator of Missed Connections, described the listings as endlessly intriguing "because they mix the natural desire to make a good first impression and the very human need to get a second chance.

Love and lust are just starting points for Missed Connections. After all, in an age when everyone is just a swipe away from a potential date, we can easily find romance and sex without resorting to antiquated message boards. But what the listings lack in technological precision is what makes them so special. They capture the stuff that love only offers up when you're not looking for it: You can find those things with another human being, but you can also find them in the endless search for someone, seeking a second chance for what could have been, ultimately finding resolution within yourself.

Everything That You Ever Wanted to Know About Mars Retrograde : Lynn Koiner - Astrological Research

All We Ever Wanted will be published on June 26, My reviews can also be found on my blog: View all 69 comments.

And as a single mother of two boys and a girl I could see so many sides of this story One night, one thoughtless moment, and lives are changed forever What do you do if it was your son that took this picture? Meet Tom single father of Lila the girl in the infamous picture and Nina the mother of Finch the photographer Wow, this is tough!

What If it were one of my boys that took this picture? This was something that nagged at me throughout this entire book Ugh still have no idea what I would do, and fingers crossed I never need to figure it out! This book was told from the perspectives of Nina, Tom, and Lila and I thought this was super effective Nina was probably the most relatable character to me, because she was a mother Loved this book from first page to last and the ending was perfection View all 14 comments.

Apr 11, Jordana Landsman rated it liked it. Giffin asks nothing from readers but a few moments of their time, and in exchange delivers high-gloss low-payoff novels that showcase entitlement and moral ambivalence disguised as depth. By now, her pattern is set, but this time, the stakes are higher. The premise is compelling. Heck, some of my best friends are wealthy Caucasians with country club memberships…. The problem is that Giffin wants to write her characters two ways, and it leads her nowhere.

She seeks to explore the pitfalls of privilege, yet she absolves her heroines of mistakes and casts them as well-intended victims who are really good people, honest, if you just look behind the Chanel handbag and Mercedes SUV.

She is a walking fashion plate whose fondest expressions come not for her husband or son, but for the custom-made furnishings and designer clothes that her lifestyle affords her. And good for her. Three cheers for Nina, no one is judging.

But when Nina awakens from her comfortable reverie, she notices that her spoiled son and rich husband have bloomed into arrogant snobs. She spends the rest of the book castigating, criticizing, and rejecting them. What she does not do is mother her son. She never misses a Starbucks, but in the time it takes her to vilify her boy and drift out of his maternal reach, she never once grabs the scruff of his obnoxious neck to launch the tush-kicking that his behavior demands.

Indeed, her son is facing dire consequences, either with severe punishment or life as an asshole. Moms step in; Nina steps out. Nina is the character with the moral authority. This woman whose choices have contributed to, if not created, the family crisis, bails on them and casts herself as an innocent victimized bystander.

She is a powerful storyteller with a weak moral compass for her characters. Her stories build a compelling, if cliched, setup, but she is neither honest nor complete when it comes time to dole out denouement and judgment. Perhaps Giffin loves her characters too much to make them fully flawed people; perhaps she is writing too much of her own personal conflicts between success and the desire to be perceived as good.

Whatever drives her pen, it should demand more of stories and her characters. Let them come to it honestly. The vulnerability of privileged suburban American life to sudden and shocking fragmentation is fertile ground for writers with the guts to write authentic characters and ambiguous conflicts.

In contrast, All We Ever Wanted is a minor entry in the genre. For Giffin fans, who appreciate the escapism of her breezy, readable style, this is another easy sell and quick read.

For readers looking below the glossy surface, seeking the painful yet redemptive truths that quality fiction can offer, this one will leave you wanting.

I received an advanced review copy of this book from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review. View all 6 comments. May 21, Cheri rated it really liked it Shelves: Her father was a writer for the Bristol Herald Courier and her mother was, formerly, a fourth grade teacher.

A happy, middle class family. They imbibe booze, they schmooze, and on the other side of town, their son was risking everything he had, his future, in a moment of lapsed judgement, acts on an idea involving a party with lots of alcohol, an unconscious girl, and a cell phone. He could never afford to send her there otherwise. She reaches out to help. If he did this thing he is accused of, she wants him to confess, repent and take responsibility for his actions.

Through the alternating thoughts of Nina, Tom, and Lyla, we are able to see the flaws become cracks and then everything erupts. The accusations that flow when Tom approaches the Academy in search of justice for his daughter. A woman examining what she believes in, what she wants from her life, a town that thrives on gossip and unkind remarks, a husband who has no moral compass, and a young girl desperately in need of someone to listen, and believe in her, too.

But that is not to say this is not a love story, only that it is not your soft, happy, tears-on-my-pillow kind of love story. Jun 23, Reading. What would you do if your son is accused of sharing a picture with his buddies that contains a half naked girl with a racist "joke" as the caption? Well that is exactly what Nina has to find out when her son Finch is accused of doing just that. Told in alternating viewpoints, this book is a heavy hitter that touches on a lot of pertinent issues in today's society.

Chapters alternate between Nina, Finch, Lyla who is the girl in the picture, Lyla's dad Tom, plus a bit of Nina's husband Kirk sprinkled in. I loved the way Giffin did this because not only did it keep the story interesting, it also made figuring out who was telling the truth much harder. Each character had a very strong, unique voice so you can tell this isn't Giffin's first rodeo, and the characterization was perfect for me.

While the main storyline has to do with the photo, there is also a touch of romance, marital woes, keeping up with the Joneses, and relationships between parents and their children. There are so many topics touched upon and I found the book to be quite emotional. Not only is the cover of All We Ever Wanted beautiful, but the inside is as well.

There is struggle and sadness, but also a good dose of happiness and hope as well. They are very strong female characters and they weren't doormats which was refreshing to say the least. I have heard that All We Ever Wanted is nothing like Giffin's other books which mainly seem to be romantic in nature , but it was such an amazing book that it makes me want to read her other novels right away.

Her writing is superb and she is such an amazing storyteller. I will definitely be thinking of this book for months, and maybe even years, to come. All We Ever Wanted in 3-ish words: View all 3 comments. Aug 13, Brandice rated it really liked it. All We Ever Wanted is a timely story about Lyla and Finch, two high schoolers attending an elite private prep school in Nashville, who both go to a party one night.

Lyla gets drunk and a compromising photo of her with a racist caption surfaces following the party. Nina came from a humble background and tries to instill the right values in Finch, despite his wealthy upbringing and ostentatious father.

I appreciated the varying viewpoints among the three main characters, all of whom I liked, and quickly became engrossed in the story. This book focuses on choosing between right and wrong, as well as money vs. Some people believe money can be thrown at a problem and that everyone has a price.

Some people believe justice is the only price. And some people just want to be liked. Jun 11, Carrie rated it it was amazing Shelves: One drunken night leads to a risque photo being passed around of a young teenage girl leading to the characters all dealing with the situation from their own points of views.

Nina Browning is the mother of the boy accused of taking the photograph and is appalled at his behavior. She desperately wants her son to see that what he did was not right and not hide behind his father or their money. Tom Volpe is the single working class father of the teenager Lyla who was the subject of the photo.

The book follows Nina, Tom and Lyla and changes the point of view between them as the incident unfolds to see how they all cope with what had happened. The author did a wonderful job conveying just how each person was feeling and their prospective on what was going on making it feel as if we were there witnessing the events with them and the effect it was having on each family throughout. It was wonderful to watch each grow and learn from their own mistakes and those of others in the story.

I received an advance copy from the publisher via NetGalley. For more review please visit https: View all 8 comments. Sep 28, Elyse rated it really liked it. This is my first Emily Giffin book They have similar themes The Family conflicts are clear: Emily Giffin does a great job including us with the thought- process She keeps us interested that way. Lots of sex and sex related issues of all kinds associated with High School kids - rape - secrets - racial bigotry - troubled marriages - single parenting - class divide - jealousy- social media dangers - communications We look at the value of achievement be it grades, sports, business, wealth , vs.

Emily Giffin covers a wide range of human conditions to chew on. View all 19 comments. Jun 23, Meredith B. I love Emily Giffin and I get so excited when I hear the annoucement that a new book of her's is coming out. She seems to take really relevant experiences and apply them to a fictional story so that we can all somehow relate. Nina and Kirk are a wealthy couple. They drive nice cars, they have a 4 million dollar house and they have a housekeeper who does all the work for them.

They also have a son, Finch, who just got into Princeton and is not only a great student but an all a 4. They also have a son, Finch, who just got into Princeton and is not only a great student but an all around great kid.

Lyla comes from a single father home, her mom is an alcoholic but her dad wanted better for her. She is an incredibly smart girl and therefore was given financial aid to go to the town's top school.. Her Dad is a carpenter for the town and does his best for him and his daughter. One night Lyla and Finn end up at the same party after lying to her dad about "studying" but really what teen doesn't??

Lyla gets sick, her friend Grace brings her home and we just think it was a night of some teens drinking and being stupid. The next day however a photo spreads around town and turns into chaos. Lyla just can't seem to remember anything that happened. Thus starts the conflict, the questions and we start to find out the moral of each of the characters.

What happens when your husband and you disagree on a parenting decision? What if your morals suddenly don't add up? Do our experiences when we were younger always shape who we are today? Can you always protect your daughter from 'bad' people? Some choices you make will forever be held against you I flew through this book. It caused me to stop and think so many times what I would do in Nina, Tom and Lyla's shoes.

I love how they all come from different places but try to work together to resolve conflict. It was also a very relatable story in the sense that this probably happens to a lot of youth in today's age.

Also, can we talk about this cover. This book comes out June 26th and I highly recommend you pick it up! View all 29 comments. As a parent of a 12 year old son that seems to be growing quicker than I'd like him to be I found this book to be quite terrifying.

We all want to believe our children are thoughtful, empathetic, and responsible beings but that's not always the case and sometimes our children are going to disappoint us.

The entire time I was reading this novel I couldn't help but think "What would I do? I was angry, I was frustrated, I was sad, yet I was As a parent of a 12 year old son that seems to be growing quicker than I'd like him to be I found this book to be quite terrifying.

I was angry, I was frustrated, I was sad, yet I was hopeful throughout. They are beaming with pride for their son when the horrific happens. Their son is accused of taking a picture of a girl, exposed, while passed out at a party captioned with a racist comment. He then sends it to a couple of buddies who then send it to a couple of buddies until guess what? Lyla is the girl in the picture. She is the bi-racial daughter of single dad Tom.

Tom is understandably furious while Lyla just wants it all to go away. She is embarrassed and doesn't want her entire education at Windsor Academy put at risk. From here we follow along with alternating chapters between Nina, Lyla, and Tom and I have to say I was absolutely enthralled to see how this all played out. This book is not only topical but important. A must read, indeed! View all 17 comments. Aug 27, Kelly and the Book Boar rated it did not like it Shelves: Find all of my reviews at: Simply put, this was the most basic white girl of chick lit and was absolutely.

Jun 23, Jill Croce-McGill rated it it was amazing. She takes us on a powerful journey through marriage, motherhood, friendship, teen life, racism, and the negative effect of social media.

This book definitely deals with some heavy topics that are going on in today's world right now. The story is told from three points of view: Nina, Tom, and Lyla Tom's daughter. I have to say, I loved all three of these characters! First, we have Nina, she is living the dream. She has a wealthy handsome husband, and a son who is going off to Princeton in the Fall.

She has it all! Then, we have Tom, he's a lonely single father raising Lyla and working several jobs to pay the bills. But unfortunately, she doesn't always fit in. Then, one photo, that was shared on social media, changes their lives forever. In the end, they have to choose between their family and their values.

This was a very powerful and moving read for me. View all 16 comments. May 29, Jenny rated it really liked it. Children who are obedient and responsible bring to their parents unending pride and satisfaction.

Griffin gives the reader a chance to see the point of view from all the main characters in real time giving us a chance to feel the highs and lows of every person involved. I find myself still thinking about this book a week later and discussing it with friends and family. A definite must read and should be on everyones book club list. I received a copy of this book via Netgalley. It did effect my review of this book. Jun 25, Marialyce rated it really liked it.

My reviews can be found at: Can you ever forget them? No matter how old you are you can flashback to those years with trepidation and the thought that god I am glad those are over. It is a time of so much that is unsure, the feelings, the emotions, the constant knowing that it always seemed as if your life was spiraling out of control.

The arguments, the searching for control Nina Browing has it all. She is married to a very wealthy man, has oodles of money, a fabulous house, and a son she adores. Her husband is ever so successful, a bit of a snob well maybe more than a bit but it is her son, Finch, where her love and adoration lies.

He has been accepted to Princeton and life look very sweet for this golden boy but then Lyla Volpe lives with her dad. They are not even close to being in the socioeconomic stratosphere which the Brownings and others of their ilk exists and yet, Lyla attends on scholarship the prestigious academy where Finch is a senior to her sophomore status. They attend a party, unsupervised by adults and drink and then a picture is taken of Lyla that will eventually open up all the prejudices, some of them racially motivated and a series of lies that lead Nina in search of who she is married to and what her son is becoming.

This was a well developed story that pointed ever so well to what can and does happen when teenagers drink and think nothing of the consequences of their actions.

It is a story of how privilege often gets in the way of what is right and how the brains and actions of teens can often prove a major downfall to themselves, their families and those who surround them. It is a story of young attractions, of social media and its sometimes harrowing effect on our teens, and how is it possible to be responsible parents when life surrounds our teens with all its allure and it very many pitfalls.

Welcome to the teenage years. View all 20 comments. Jul 02, Debbie Oliphant rated it it was amazing. I could not put this book down.

It was so intense and relevant today. The story details the life of the privileged families who are held to a different set of rules nor held accountable for their actions. A mistake is revealed that is life changing, for a young girl who comes from a blue collar family and a young man who is entitled and comes from an affluent family, both attending a prestigious, expensive school.

The event is revealed early in the story but through multiple points of vie WOW!!!!! The event is revealed early in the story but through multiple points of view, the true story is revealed by the disparity of classes and how wealth provides access that can alter an outcome where actions have consequences. This story was paced perfectly and the story grabbed and engaged you immediately. Intense, emotional and so climatic in the end. The is my first book from this author and look forward to more.

Tom Volpe is a single father and a skilled carpenter. He lives modestly on the east side of town and his daughter, Lyla has excelled scholastically, earning a scholarship to Windsor. This was an extremely troubling but compelling story told through the eyes of Nina, Tom and Lyla. Contemporary issues involving sexting, teenage drinking, social bullying and traditional tensions between those that have and others that have less.

It puts her at odds with her husband whose only goal is to help his son evade the consequences of his behavior, furthering instilling his sense of entitlement. All of the characters were changed by what happened, Nina most profoundly as it forced her to take an unfiltered look at her life. It felt real though some of the people in her world seemed a bit caricature, but it illustrated the salient points effectively.

Everyone was trying to do the best for their children but not all actions were in their best interests. It felt as though they were inhabiting the skin of their characters. And that thought provoking ending was truly the best final touch. I received an advance copy from the publisher in exchange for an unbiased review View all 9 comments. Nov 07, Kristy rated it liked it Shelves: Nina and Kirk Browning and their teenage son, Finch, live a good life, especially since Kirk sold his company and the family has experienced a great deal of wealth.

Nina and Kirk are attending a fundraiser when they hear whispering that Finch has been involved in an incident with another student at his school, Windsor Academy. It soon comes out that Finch has taken an inappropriate sexy picture of Lyla at a party and sent it to friends, accompanied by a racist comment. The photo spreads around t Nina and Kirk Browning and their teenage son, Finch, live a good life, especially since Kirk sold his company and the family has experienced a great deal of wealth.

The photo spreads around the community quickly, causing both the kids and parents to take sides. Lyla's father, Tom, who has been raising Lyla since she was small, is appalled--he cannot believe his daughter is involved in such a mess, and he wants justice for her. Lyla's at Windsor on a scholarship, and she just wants to fit in. Now, Nina, Finch, Lyla, and Tom must grapple with the aftermath of the photo and what exactly happened the night of the party.

This is a timely novel that certainly has a place in the MeToo moment. It's a topic being covered more and more lately, and the idea of teens and sexting is just as horrifying as always. It draws you in from the beginning, and I found it to be a very fascinating read that kept my interest throughout. By alternating the point of view between Nina, Tom, and Lyla, we get to the story told from a range of characters, including the victim herself.

The biggest issue I had with this one--and even Lyla herself admits it--is that the characters sometimes come across as cliche: The only light of resistance is Nina, our wealthy wife with the obnoxious, rich husband.

Even Nina's friends appear to be clueless or worse jerks brainwashed by their picture perfect Nashville lives. Still, Lyla is a great kid and reading her sections is lovely. Her father is a flawed individual, but you can't help but empathize with him as well. Nina is more complicated, and I would have liked to see her take on a little more responsibility for her son and the events that unfold around her. Yes, Nina had a conscience, but she didn't seem to do a lot with it, if that makes any sense, besides apologize.

In the end, I enjoyed this one because it wasn't totally predictable and because I really liked the characters of Lyla and Tom.

I found it to be an easy and quick read. Still, it seemed like something was missing as I read , whether it was because some of the book felt like it was populated by stock characters or what, I don't know. While it's not exactly the same story, I would recommend the amazing Girl Made of Stars from Ashley Herring Blake if you're looking for a timely book on this topic.

That powerful book blows this one out of the water, and maybe it's that power and emotion that I felt was lacking here. I received a copy of this book from the publisher and Netgalley in return for an unbiased review thank you! View all 10 comments. Jul 17, katwiththehat rated it liked it Shelves: This was for large parts of it, a good book that asked compelling, relevant questions.

Some of the characters I literally wanted to strangle every time they appeared on the page. No redeeming char This was for large parts of it, a good book that asked compelling, relevant questions. No redeeming characteristics, which was unusual.

You either are going to hate a character or love them. Essentially, there is a party, and a rich boy takes a semi-nude photo of a girl from the other side of town, then posts it to social media. How far would a parent go to protect their child is the question the book asks. It was like a guillotine dropped ten pages from the end, and destroyed any point the book might have been leading up to.

A friend tried to hours to get a router to work. When Mars turned Direct, he discovered that it was just a bad router! Because I chose a perfect time to start the trip, all went well A friend and I were looking forward to a workshop in Virginia Beach, which we signed up for while Mars was R — then the big snow hit the east coast and all was canceled.

Probably more than you ever wanted to know! The election of Michael Dukakis, a Scorpio, was unable to defend himself against the verbal assaults of Vice President Bush as soon as Mars turned retrograde. It was not until Mars turned direct on October 28— 4 days before the election— that he began to assert himself. His meek approach was confusing to both his staff of advisors and campaign commentators— but not to astrologers who knew that Mars was transiting retrograde.

The presidency commenced under a Mars retrograde influence. Many local astrologers predicted that this would not be a constructive administration. Mars retrograde in the 2nd House of the U. Gemini rising chart focused upon financial and economic issues. With Mars retrograde, nothing was accomplished! Clinton commanded changes in the attitude of homosexuals in the military. Such direct action was not appropriate for Mars retrograde and the matter met success only through the indirect approach of the Sam Nunn compromise.

Yet, nothing really changed with the military. It was actually worse. I use 3 charts for the United States. The Gemini rising chart influences Americans as a people, national issues and relations with Canada and Mexico. The Sagittarius rising chart is always active with crises and actions involving other countries. The Articles of Confederation chart affects the government itself and it is always active with government scandals spy scandals show up in this chart. It is common to see battles igniting during the retrograde period but whoever fires the first shot loses.

Little Argentina never really had a chance against Great Britain but, when they fired the first shot in the Falklands, they were condemned to lose in a big way.

The Russians fired the first shot in Afghanistan and, after spending billions, they were ultimately forced to withdraw. The Winter Olympics occurred when Mars was retrograde in Virgo. Mishaps plagued this event, especially for the United States. If using the Gemini rising chart, Mars was retrograde in the 5th House ruling sporting activities and competitive games!

Around the first 10 days of February , Mars was station in Libra. During the period from February through April when Mars was retrograde, there were many recorded dismissals, failed votes, blocked plans, revisions, acquittals, dropped changes, failed amendments and expulsions. A list of some of the major events of that Mars Retrograde period are:.

In , Mars retrograde: At Station, there was an unsuccessful coup in the Philippines. There were many terrorist bombings, including the bombing of the UN headquarters in Baghdad. There were several oustings, referendums and resignations of political leaders during this cycle. It would not be until after World War II that scientists would be able to test this theory. It was not until the Sun-Mars conjunction in that the Americans voted to enter the war in Europe. There is an obvious pattern of aggressive action with Mars Retrograde will be corrected when Mars moves behind the Sun.

The Republicans also took control of the Congress and they did nothing, never keeping their Promise to America. In , Mars Retrograde in Leo can be very frustrating for our Leo president, especially beginning at the end of January Mars Retrograde brings discoveries and breakthroughs in technology.

This will be helped by the Jupiter-Uranus conjunction in Since the Mars sign shows how people respond when they are angry and how they react to the anger in others, Mars in Leo causes people to become angered and highly uncooperative due to pride and respect the lack of issues. It is important to keep this in mind when interacting with others and cooperation is required. Of course, we ourselves will be equally sensitive to pride and dis respect issues but, if we want to accomplish our objectives, we need to treat others with the same respect that we demand for ourselves.

Leo appreciates the dramatic! This is a great time to do something sensational and, with the fiery drive of Mars in this sign, it favors initiating new activities just for yourself.

In my research on depression, I found that people with Mars in Leo natally never get depressed— or rather they were too proud to every admit such a condition. So, this is not a cycle when you are prone to feeling despondent.

It is a remarkably happy, upbeat cycle. In past Mars in Leo cycles, I purchased tacky earrings and boot jewelry. I got my first tattoo and, 2 years later, my 2nd tattoo. I began renovations in my home and purchasing new furniture. Being good to yourself is essential with this Mars cycle.

In my journals, I found my energies more extroverted. My need for love and appreciation was strong. I seemed to get despondent when I was ignored or felt a lack of affection in my life. When angered or provoked, Mars in Leo will manifest as a disturbance in the biochemical cell salt of Magnesium Phosphate. This cell salt acts upon the motor nerves and these respond to any pain felt in the sensory nerves.

Magnesium Phosphate is found inside the cells of muscles, nerves, bones, the brain and spine. Deficiency affects muscle fibers and nerve endings. This is known as the anti-pain cell salt. It helps us to let go and relax. Spasmodic is a key symptom and Magnesium Phosphate calms spasmodic coughs, menstrual cramps and leg cramps. If lacking in Magnesium Phosphate, nerves are on edge with the inability to relax emotional showing as anxiety, nervous disorders, depression and physically showing as muscle problems, fibromyalgia even worse with a light touch, nerve sensitivity-even the skin may feel overly sensitive.

When I experienced stress, my back ached. Leo rules the back and, in shouldering burdensome responsibilities, the back will suffer. Sometimes this type of back ache is due to adrenal stress. When I take two capsules of Adrenal caps, the pain is gone within 30 minutes. Sometimes it can be due to electrolyte imbalance and a good potassium-magnesium supplement can be very helpful. Because this is an opposition, you may find that others do not support you now.

You may be enthusiastic but, when you look behind you, they will be gone! When Mars is transiting retrograde, it will be closer to the Earth than at any other time. In the case of very eccentric orbits, such as Pluto and the Centaurs, the differences between aphelion and perihelion are more significant, more dramatic, more telling…The main difference with Mars is caused, not by its eccentricity, but whether it is in front of the Sun or behind the Sun.

This is the same with the inner planets B Venus at superior direct conjunction is behind the Sun and farthest from the Earth about 1.

When Mars was behind the Sun during the summer of , Hitler was pushing his way through Europe without much resistance. Juan continues in his explanation: The average distance at opposition with the Sun, when closest to earth, is 0. While Mars has a 15 to 17 cycle in which it is both close to the Sun and close to the Earth perihelion and perigee , the apparition appearance in the sky is not always the same.

There are rare occurrences when the Earth and Mars are within 35 million miles of each other. The last time that this occurred was September , earlier in August , and it will happen again in August ! This event occurs when the Earth lined up between Mars and the Sun, reaching its closeness to the Sun and to the Earth at the same time with Mars appearing at its maximum brightness! For those with a scientific and historical interest, the most remote of the Mars perihelion occurred in and in In , Mars will reach its opposition to the Sun on June 13, make its closest approach to the Earth on June 21, and reach its perihelion or closest approach to the Sun on October For excellent graphics and descriptions, the Sky Over Berlin website is a good resource: The June perigee was the second closest in this current decade 0.

Historically, these specific dates do not figure prominently in world events— but the year itself is highly significant. In , when Mars was Retrograde in Pisces-Aries, the pioneering spirit of Aries brought the discovery of the North Pole but, with Mars Retrograde, there was a great controversy: Who reached it first, Cook or Perry? In summer, a French aviator was the first to fly across the English Channel.

With the idealistic zeal of Pisces, the ladies were protesting as suffragettes and prohibitionists. Steel strikes in Pittsburgh become violent and trigger deaths. The year was significant for terrorist activities. I find, however, the sign of Leo and alignments with fixed stars to be more significant. When a planet aligns with or occults a fixed star, it has a very special influence in world events. These Leo cycles are far more dramatic than any of the other Mars apparitions.

The Leo Fixed Stars can be found at www. You answered my question. Since it is going through my 2nd house is time to repair my finances and trying to pay off those overdue taxes is absolutely necessary. Thanks I need to re-read this. It is excellent information. Thanks so much for taking the time to give us this. I am learning so much. In my… 12th house. And, yep, already started nightly meditations plus communicating with good spirits , focusing on my breathing and writing, growing a pair and appreciating the cold, unpredictable winter season, and just calming the heck down.

I need time to myself. Last year was very busy and nuts. I finally have the hang of my schedule and can relax without feeling guilty. Any thoughts on what Mars retro might portend regarding the re-emergence of an old flame? No past relationship per se with the individual — just physical chemistry that was unable to be acted upon both of us were in relationships at the time, yet were quite hot for one another.

Bad idea or is this something that should be revisited? An astrologer cannot predict a specific person returning into your life just because Mars is R. It will only fizzle.

I think you need to move on as this is not a functional situation. I have never purchased a house when Mars was R so I cannot say. Let us know what happens. Do examine items such as the refrigerator, oven etc. I did not realize mars was retrograde and did indeed enter into a physical relationship with a friend.

I have venus and mars in aries, and he has a scorpio sun. The retrograde period is not even over yet! Can mars going direct ever help get relationships restarted? I have observed that problems in the beginning of a relationship will only worsen with time. Best to let him go — but I know this is hard initially. Going direct does not rekindle a relationship that fizzled when R…sorry.

I disagree with the theory that anyone starting something during Mars Rx will automatically lose. Because I got sick and fell behind two months on my rent, my landlord was able to start up eviction proceedings in secret and win quite readily. Even though I work 55 hours a week between two jobs and could have readily paid him back, he was able to finally move ahead with long-held wishes to break the lease and win his case.

During the retrograde, I filed a HUD complaint for discrimination against him. I am really impressed by your in — depth analysis of Various Planets and their positions in Retrogate and other factors.

I am using Parasharas light 6. It is fully aligning with what you have mentioned above. Can you please suggest to me what is the Best Book and reading material I should read apart from benefiting reading your articles. Please guide me as my Guru and beloved teacher. Thank you God Bless. Hi Lynn I was thinking about the last mars rx in January in Virgo. Virgo rules hygiene and I think its possible to pin point the time frame when that lab made those deadly steroids from which a lot of people died.

There was also a mutual reception between mars and mercury when Mercury went rx. Between March 12 and May 8, a lot of things went wrong, especially when mercury crossed Uranus -- Uranus rules unexcepted consequences.

I have Mars in Pisces retrograde within 4 degrees of my rising. I am in a Mars ruled year and Mars rules my 2nd and 9th houses. My Mars is in trine aspect to my Venus and Saturn in a grand water trine and in opposition to 3 planets in Virgo BUT not within 8 degrees. What do you think this means for me this year until BD in August. Can you help me understand the effects of having a retrograde Mars opposite my Sun in the 7th house? It is impossible to give an interpretation for a specific aspect without considering you entire chart.

But, it just means a lot of passive-aggressive issues arise in relationships but this all stems from your childhood experiences, especially wherein you learned not to express anger directly. Thank you for taking the time to reply. The passive-aggressive statement fits extremely well. It is something that actually makes me miserable, as I envy others who are able to show direct anger. Basically, I may not do anything if someone dumps coffee on my paperwork, because at the time, I will genuinely feel no immediate need to take action.

Then I will inevitably become angry days or weeks later. The anger is severe. In some cases it leaves from being passive and I will become enraged by the slightest thing the person does, despite having been passive when they did something that would have actually warranted anger.

From various sources, this is an effect of mars retrograde. However, my issue seems unusually bad. My level of passivity is just unreasonable. I try to get angry at the time of provocation, but it never happens.

I look down upon my passivity, as if I am someone who is aggressive and merely stuck in the shell of a passive person as I feel a sincerely passive person would hardly see it this way in the first place. My friend is passive but has an almost pacifist outlook and would recoil at the idea of being angry and aggressive even if someone did something wrong to him. He has none of the desires of direct anger that I have.

I just want to know what is in my chart that causes these problems. Is it because my Mars in opposite the sun in addition to being Retrograde? Dominant Venus in the first non confrontational? Mars is the issue, not Venus. When anyone has a planet in the 1st House, they usually want the relationship on their terms. This is not a bad thing. I have the Sun in the 1st so my relationships are on my terms. With an opposition, you need to negotiate or compromise so that the passive-aggressive issues do not manifest as a way for the other person to get his way.

I also have a relationship with a man with a planet in the 1st and he likes the relationship to go his way -- that he can play golf on weekends. This works for me because I need my space.

So, this is not unresolvable. I will have to give birth to a baby at the end of April It was an unexpected pregnancy. Unfortunately, Mars will be retrograde in Libra, and there is no way to rush or to postpone the birth of the child. My baby will definitely have Mars R. What will this mean to the baby for his whole life? I intend to make a Cesarean surgery — does this mean that it is an Elective surgery, although I decide this long time ago, when the Mars was not retrograde?

I am afraid for me and my baby. I choose to make a Cesarean section because I wanted to pick a best possible date for the baby to be born — I am very worried. Many people have Mars R and they do not complain. The Moon in Sagittarius is good. Mars R in Libra with the aspects that it makes is good for an International lawyer, mediating and negotiating agreements.

Thanks a lot, Lynn! I will make all efforts that my baby would be happy! I will keep you informed how the Cesarean section has gone in Mars R. Hope we both will be ok. I too will be having my first child, a girl, in the beginning of April due date is April 1st. With the Mars retrograde I am worried about the labor and fear for complications. I answered this privately and now I see that I cannot paste the answer here. I am in Europe so I will have to do this when I return from Europe in a week.

How bad is it according to your experience and believes? Is there any dates that are better then others? I have written this many times, especially under Mercury and Venus R. It has been my observation that the wedding chart only describes the wedding event. If Mercury is R, there can be delays, who has the ring? It does not describe the outcome of the marriage so just forget about this. It is the synastry between the two people that counts…not the wedding chart. To calculate good days for a Saturday, through the summer and for another Time Zone is just too consuming.

To be honest, when I have picked a great day, the woman invariably complains that something is not right…and they choose something else.

Out of frustration, I never do this work. I saw a wedding chart that did predict the outcome of the marriage. They got married on a really crappy day, and as I progressed the Moon and Sun it looked like they would either end the marriage in 4 months, or come into some very big trouble. Sure enough, 4 months later, they annulled the marriage. Hello Lynn, I have the same question as Samamtha. How will having Mars in Retrograde effect labor and delivery for me and my baby?

My 11th house lord is in the 7th house. My sun is also in the 7th house. I have my exams due May end. Getting to focus myself has been very difficult. Since a long time, I have been having a cold war with a very close friend. She is visiting my city now. She has totally distanced herself from me, although I want to reconcile. Overall, my friends are not treating me well.

My boyfriend too is completely indifferent towards me. I feel totally used by him. I feel very restless these days. Although practicing meditation does give me some peace of mind,I feel totally lost. Should I sit back and tolerate bad behavior and disrespect or should I stand up for myself or should I totally avoid meeting them remaining silent during this period? With so much emotional turmoil my studies have been hampered.

K — This sketchy information about your chart does not tell me anything about what is going on in your chart and it really is much more intense and internal than what could be caused my Mars R. You need to look at the outer planet transits to your chart, even the degree aspects which cause problems that cannot be resolved easily.

Sorry I cannot help in this matter. It seems that you need a major shift in relationships. Maybe they are unaware of how they are treating you but you need to take a risk and say STOP. Worrying about people in your life can keep you from focusing upon your exams. Hard as it may be you cannot allow this. Hello Lynn, I scheduled a hemorrhoid surgery for April 22, Does that mean I should chose another date? The Moon is in the sign of Pisces where it is always strong. This is an excellent time for relationships and financial decisions.

All Venus aspects favor social events. Lots of people around me are having teeth problems. It turned into a war that I seem to be losing at the moment. Several friends got terrible news from their dentists too, and fighting losing battles — more pain, more complications that I even knew possible.

Two of them found about bone density problems. Is this what rx Mars does? Or is it just bringing problems to the surface? Did I make a mistake when I made the first appointment?

Dear Lynn My husband and son are both Aries. He literally nearly died in a crash now in April both Mercury and Mars will be in retrograde and I am truly scared. My son was born on Are there particularly dangerous days? There is little that I can tell from a birth date. I would need to make a detailed evaluation of all of these charts.

However, Mars R is indicative a repressed anger so, when it turn R, an accident can be a project of internal stress. Is it a bad time to start a new job or move to a new city? I also have mars iin the first house gemini , so I suspect I maybe more sensitive to mars RX than most people.

Thank you in advance, K. My mom was trying to break off some branches that were rubbing the roof of her house. There was a hurricane warning. My mom fell off the roof, 2 stories, onto a huge rock. Her spine was crushed in some areas and broken in many other areas. The emergency room said she was paralyzed. My mom had a nearly 19 hour surgery almost 48 hours after the accident. Cadaver spine was inserted, 2 metal rods and 40 bolts. My mom learned to walk again. She can drive, walk, go to the grocery store using an electric grocery cart , feed her self and live in a house on her own.

Last year she painted her back deck. If she looks straight up she faints due to the spinal injury. My brother bought his first car. It broke down 1 or 2 days later on the day of, or the day before my mom had her accident. He left the car on the side of the road. My mom was in the hospital, 4 hours away from our home, for 7 or 8 months.

The cost of the fines were more than the value of the car a few weeks after the accident. My best friend, that killed himself described below , talked to the tow truck company and they agreed to give the car back to my brother at no cost. The cost of the repairs was more than the value of the car and more than what my brother paid for the car. My brother was 16 or 17 years old. He worked for 2 years to save the money to buy the car.

It would be another year or 2 before he got a car again. My best friend of 20 years, since I was a kid, shot himself in the mouth during an argument with his wife. I had been sobbing since I got the news. Very recently another friend of ours, who had been living with my best friend and his wife, told me that it was an accident.

My best friend was arguing with his wife. His wife was also going to leave her 2 children, from a previous relationship, with my best friend. His wife was a stripper. During the argument his wife went into the office in their home. My friend followed with a gun in his mouth. His wife turned and slammed the door with both arms. The door slammed my friend in the mouth, broke his teeth, and he shot himself in the mouth.

My nephew was born on September 17, in the afternoon during the Mars Rx. My mom was in a trauma center, after 19 hours of surgery, in Miami FL. I was at a trade show in Chicago that my boss told me I had to go to or I would be fired. My nephew is absolutely fantastic!

It was simply amazing to watch. His teachers say he is smart and helps all of the kids who are having trouble learning. He has had trouble with reading. There have been a few broken pencils and tears. His teachers say that he takes a leadership role in the classroom in a way that all of the other children love. He loves to dance. He saves the money he gets for birthdays, Easter, Halloween and Christmas. Outside of the stadium a person was playing a guitar.

My nephew asked the may why he was doing that. The man said he lost his job and was hungry. He likes Little Pony cartoons and loves that guy that has an astronomical number of subscribers. My nephew started making silly videos when he was 5 or 6 years old. He has just started to care about the kind of sneakers he wears to school.

My Mars Rx born nephew wanted to volunteer at a soup kitchen for Christmas. My husband volunteers hours a week, in addition to his full time job, so my husband really wants to have a few days of rest on Christmas week. My nephew and sister did their volunteering at the soup kitchen prior to Christmas so her son would get what he wanted for Christmas and my husband would get what he wanted for Christmas. Yes, Mars R is not as bad as Mercury R. You would think that R would be good for renovations.

With one renovation, it took much longer because there were bad pipes under the kitchen floor discovered when the floor was to be replaced.

I had to wait until a plumber fixed it and then the renovations got finished. So, good to be patience and flexible. I am getting revision eyebrow lift and rhinoplasty done from different doctors. Since it is second time. I really want to get it done right. Can you please help me find the best possible dates. May be in march or april for eyebrow lift and later sometime for revision rhinoplasty. I know historically Mars Retrograde is not the best time to initiate — but are there exceptions to that rule if the native in question me if Mars retrograde natal?

Thank you for sharing your personal experience of Mars R since you were born with Mars R.

Most of the time we miss a chance at a real relationship because we In fact, Craigslist has it's very own outlet for just such lost opportunities called Missed . And yet, while he had every quality I could ever want in someone I. It's possible to miss your flight without ever getting stuck in a long security families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. Started in , Craigslist's Missed Connections section is wildly popular. walls of this site, I want you to know that I have an enchanted time sitting you never called me back. i cried a lot. i drowned in my own tears. i died. i.