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The Onion "newspaper"'s 27 November euphemisms for menstruation. Chart borrowed from the Onion; I'll return it when done. Some are real, some probably bogus - those incurable joksters! Read The Onion, a humor site. I had my first period at ten.

I'm fifty now; do the math. At this point, the euphemisms have their own euphemisms. Both friends and family were well-read and fond of puns and word play. I also went to an all-girl school for three years. Our ability to share freely was equaled by our fear of talking about the subject in front of males.

I'll try not to repeat what is already on the site It's marvelous, by the way! My mom used to buy the super pads. We asked her to buy the Detroit or local daily instead. We would describe the flow by what section we needed. Business section meant ordinary, funnies meant an unusual period, and Parade a very small section meant a panty liner.

Tampons became the special advertising insert. This led to headlines for the section; most of these were references to other terms you have already included. Ragtime music got a similar treatment in that it started out as just that phrase but became more varied and less direct. Mom knew more of the musicians and writers, so we just guessed when she mentioned someone new. I still think of Modess and Midol sometimes when Scott Joplin's name comes up in conversation.

The Canadian flag is white with a large red maple leaf. Washing machines have cycles, so there is a set of descriptions involving rinse and spin.

This leads to agitation settings. Songs you could sing or hum were good for code: Offensive to our Jewish friends. No Jews allowed well, some Jewish guys still did. Won't be having the Rabbi over for dinner tonight. Not Kosher for Passover Also draws in the image of lamb's blood on the door frames. Because there would be no need for a rabbit test: Another rabbit's life is spared!

Peter Rabbit is hopping. Br'er Rabbit's is laughing again. Hopping down the bunny trail. Here come Flopsy and Mopsy. It's not Easter but the rabbit's celebrating anyway. Don't need to rewrite the will this week. Came dangerously close to the gene pool but am currently toweling off.

The pediatricians are getting worried about losing future customers, so Dr. Blank is busy drawing Binky, learning more about the dynamic opportunities in the heating and cooling industry, taking in a boarder, etc. Different brands' slogans, commercial copy, pseudotext from instructional pamphlets, etc: Because an egg did not become fertilized and implant itself, I am experiencing a normal shedding of the uterine lining. She's not colorfast this week.

Once at the beach, my friend's 'friend' came early and caught her unprepared. She didn't have her own car with her to go to the store.

I showed her where we kept the stash and told her to use what she needed. The next day we went out on the lake in small, inflatable rafts. She had a brand-new red hooded sweatshirt tied around her waist.

As we were getting into the raft, she leaned over and dipped part of the shirt into the lake. The dye from the material ran bright red against the yellow raft. In an offended hostess voice, I reminded her that, as a guest, she was welcome to use whatever she needed.

We were still trying to push off from the beach while both curled up in the fetal position laughing. That made our butts drag on the sand so we had even less chance of getting the raft launched. Waves came over the side and the raft filled higher and higher with reddish pink water.

The guys paddled back to help us and see what we were laughing about. I think they figured it out. Any conversation including the words light, regular, and super means you need a tampon. At some offices, the employer thoughtfully provides a free supply. Thus, women refer to 'certain paper products only available in the ladies room. She made a noise that I recognized and I asked her if she needed me to hand her something.

Through the crack in the door she saw me reach for a tampon, and said, 'No, the little square box. Synchronizing up was common in the dorm so PMS hit the floor like a tornado sometimes. It coincided with midterms once, and a floor mate dismissed a loud fight between two roommates as, 'They'll be friends again by next week. They're fighting over the heating pad. Disposal issues fall under the term girl garbage. As in, 'Where do you put your girl garbage?

I have special girl stuff to do. This means 'No, I can't wait until the next rest stop. I'm missing only wearing one sock.

She's wearing white socks. How can you tell if she's having her period? She's only wearing one sock. What kills Whatever women? The Egyptian Flu makes you a mummy. I don't remember calling it the Egyptian Flow but that makes sense now. We did add Walk Like an Egyptian to the song list, though. You think your typewriter's pregnant because it skipped a period.

I was surprised that more terms involving mouse mattresses were not listed. Keeping the mouse up nights, making the mouse sleep on the floor or the couch, being a mouseketeer, Mickey Mouse gestures, etc.

Heavy periods meant evacuating all of the mice due to extreme flooding, of course. As for the communists invading the summer house, we called it the red army and it invaded the southlands. Strings attached was common in Michigan in the '70s as was ram a tam by non-sorority women. I was hospitalized in England and they referred to the pads by the brand name Dr Whites. I was raised during a time when cramps meant you were unhappy with your gender or maybe a lesbian.

My mother didn't tell me about cramps because she didn't want to put ideas into my head. I was even more upset to find that these symptoms were going to accompany each and every period. I'd need a heating pad, supply of hot tea, and a barf bucket for two or three days every month - for decades to come!

I remember sitting down with a calendar and trying to imagine how many life events were going to be ruined from that moment on. Some of them would catch me alone and whisper things about aspirin and whiskey, but most would smile that every 28 days like clockwork smile. I knew they weren't going to help the women's rights movement any.

I think that women who have never had uncomfortable experiences with menstruation have less reason to create humor around the subject. They miss out on a certain bond we fellow sufferers have.

Perhaps it is the other way around now, and women who don't get PMS or cramps feel less womanly. It would be nice if we could just be ourselves, just be the women we are playing the hands we were dealt instead of being judgmental towards each other.

Yes, these have all been uttered at some point. Most were short-lived until I typed them. The average length in use for the less popular was three to days. It did take quite a while to search my organic database for these terms. I had started a list when I discovered your site a few years back but I lost or deleted it.

Every once in a while, I'd remember another one and add it to this new document.

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Transsexual Pre-op Sexual orientation: Our Chennai escorts are intended to indulgence the beauty lovers. That map was bleeding red I always used to believe in [polls]. I don't believe them anymore. On November 9, , at 3: According to the authors of Shattered: Obama aide David Simas called Clinton campaign manager Robby Mook to unsuccessfully persuade Clinton to concede the election.

Obama then called Clinton herself, citing the importance of continuity of government , to publicly acknowledge that Trump had won; believing that she was still unwilling to concede the president called Podesta, telling him that the election was over, but the call to Clinton had likely already persuaded her.

Six states plus a portion of Maine that Obama won in switched to Trump. These are with Electoral College votes in parentheses: Florida 29 , Pennsylvania 20 , Ohio 18 , Michigan 16 , Wisconsin 10 , Iowa 6 , and Maine's second congressional district 1.

Initially, Trump won exactly more Electoral College votes than Mitt Romney in , with two lost to faithless electors the following month. Thirty-nine states swung more Republican compared to the previous presidential election, while eleven states and the District of Columbia swung more Democratic. Examining overall turnout in the election , University of Florida Prof. Michael McDonald estimated [] that Data scientist Azhar Hamdan, explained the paradoxes of the outcome compared Trump's 30 states against Clinton's 20 states and the District of Columbia , [] [] saying "chief among them the discrepancy between the popular vote, which Hillary Clinton won by 2.

Dave Leip's Atlas of U. Retrieved February 4, For Bernie Sanders and John Kasich: Chris Suprun stated that he cast his presidential vote for John Kasich and his vice presidential vote for Carly Fiorina.

The other faithless elector in Texas, Bill Greene, cast his presidential vote for Ron Paul but cast his vice presidential vote for Mike Pence, as pledged. The exact numbers of write-in votes for Sanders have been published for three states.

In California, his official running mate was Tulsi Gabbard and in New Hampshire and Vermont there was not a running mate attached to Sanders. The table below displays the official vote tallies by each state's Electoral College voting method. The source for the results of all states is the official Federal Election Commission report.

The column labeled "Margin" shows Trump's margin of victory over Clinton the margin is negative for every state the Clinton won. A total of 29 third party and independent presidential candidates appeared on the ballot in at least one state. Independent candidate Evan McMullin , who appeared on the ballot in 11 states, received over , votes 0. Wisconsin went Republican for the first time since , while Pennsylvania and Michigan went Republican for the first time since The Clinton campaign pledged to participate in the Green Party recount efforts, while Trump backers challenged them in court.

The winner of the statewide vote gets two additional electoral votes. Red denotes states or congressional districts whose electoral votes are awarded separately won by Republican Donald Trump; blue denotes those won by Democrat Hillary Clinton.

Most media outlets announced the beginning of the presidential race about twenty months prior to Election Day. Soon after the first contestants declared their candidacy, Larry Sabato listed Virginia, Colorado, Iowa, New Hampshire, Florida, Nevada, and Ohio as the seven states most likely to be contested in the general election.

After Donald Trump clinched the Republican presidential nomination, many pundits felt that the major campaign locations might be different from what had originally been expected. Rust Belt states such as Pennsylvania , Wisconsin , and even Michigan were thought to be in play with Trump as the nominee, while states with large minority populations, such as Colorado and Virginia , were expected to shift towards Clinton.

According to Politico [] and the online blog, his path to victory went through states such as Florida, North Carolina, Nevada, New Hampshire, and possibly Colorado. Early polling indicated a closer-than-usual race in former Democratic strongholds such as Washington , Delaware , New Jersey , Connecticut , Maine for the two statewide electoral votes , and New Mexico. Some reviews took this information as evidence of an expanded 'swing-state map'.

A consensus among political pundits developed throughout the primary election season regarding swing states. Trump's primary campaign was propelled by victories in Democratic states, and his supporters often did not identify as Republican. For example, Utah was the reddest state in , although the Republican share was boosted significantly by the candidacy of Mormon candidate Mitt Romney.

Media reports indicated that both candidates planned to concentrate on Florida, Pennsylvania, Ohio and North Carolina. These generally rate the race by the likelihood for each party to win a state.

As the parameters of the race established themselves, analysts converged on a narrower list of contested states, which were relatively similar to those of recent elections. Additionally, a district from each of Maine and Nebraska were considered to be coin flips. Clinton won states like New Mexico by less than 10 percentage points. States won by Obama in the contest , such as Ohio 18 , Iowa 6 , and Maine's second district 1 , were also won by Trump.

The close result in Maine was not expected by most commentators, nor were Trump's victory of over 10 points in the second district and their disparities. After the conventions of the national parties, candidates from the main parties carried out trips to the states: Results by vote distribution among states. The size of each state's pie chart is proportional to its number of electoral votes. Red denotes counties that went to Trump; blue denotes counties that went to Clinton.

Results by county, shaded according to winning candidate's percentage of the vote Red-Purple-Blue view. United States presidential election, cartogram. The voter survey is based on exit polls completed by 24, voters leaving voting places throughout the United States on Election Day , in addition to 4, telephone interviews with early and absentee voters.

The election also represented the first time that Republicans performed better among lower-income whites than among affluent white voters. Meanwhile, Trump increased his lead with non-Hispanic white voters through 1 percent over Mitt Romney's performance, and American Indians , Alaska Natives , and Pacific Islanders shifted their support towards the Republican candidate using the same relative amount.

However, "more convincing data" [] from the polling firm Latino Decisions indicates that Clinton received a higher share of the Hispanic vote, and Trump a lower share, than the Edison exit polls showed.

Various methods were used to forecast the outcome of the election. These models mostly showed a Democratic advantage since the nominees were confirmed, and were supported by pundits and statisticians, including Nate Silver of FiveThirtyEight, Nate Cohn at The New York Times , and Larry Sabato from the Crystal Ball newsletter, who predicted a Democratic victory in competitive presidential races and projected consistent leads in several battleground states around the country.

However, FiveThirtyEight's model pointed to the possibility of an Electoral College-popular vote split widening in the final weeks based on Trump's improvement in swing states like Florida or Pennsylvania. This was due to the demographics targeted by Trump's campaign which lived in big numbers there, in addition to Clinton's poor performance in several of those swing states in comparison with Obama's performance in , as well as having a big number of her potential voters in very populated traditionally 'blue' states, but also in some very populated states traditionally 'red', like Texas, which were projected safe for Trump.

Early exit polls generally favored Clinton. Three states Pennsylvania, Wisconsin and Michigan which were considered to be part of Clinton's firewall , were won by Trump. This result stands in contrast to the results , when President Obama won all but Indiana , which he carried in This table displays the final polling average published by Real Clear Politics on November 7, the actual electoral margin, and the over-performance by either candidate relative to the polls.

Many pollsters were puzzled by the failure of mainstream forecasting models to predict the outcome of the election. The sole exception was Maine's 2nd congressional district. Trump's victory, considered unlikely by most forecasts, [] [] [] [] [] was characterized as an "upset" and as "shocking" by the media. Following the announcement of Trump's election, large protests broke out across the United States with some continuing for several days.

Protesters have held up a number of different signs and chanted various shouts including "Not my president" and "We don't accept the president-elect". High school and college students walked out of classes to protest. At some protests fires were lit, flags and other items were burned and people yelled derogatory remarks about Trump. Rioters also broke glass at certain locations. After the election, computer scientists, including J. Alex Halderman , the director of the University of Michigan Center for Computer Security and Society, urged the Clinton campaign to request an election recount in Wisconsin, Michigan, and Pennsylvania three swing states where Trump had won narrowly for the purpose of excluding the possibility that the hacking of electronic voting machines had influenced the recorded outcome.

Donald Trump and New Hampshire governor Chris Sununu both complained that liberal voters from Massachusetts were illegally bused into New Hampshire for the election, and Scott Brown blamed the same phenomenon for losing his senate race in They found that in every case, field inspectors were able to determined that the voters were from New Hampshire, though they were riding a bus operated by an out-of-state company which has its name and address written on the outside of the bus, presumably the source of the confusion.

On November 23, Green Party presidential candidate Jill Stein launched a public fundraiser to pay for recounts in Wisconsin , Michigan , and Pennsylvania , asserting that the election's outcome had been affected by hacking in those states; Stein did not provide evidence for her claims. Stein filed for a recount in Wisconsin on November 25, [] after which Clinton campaign general counsel Marc Elias stated that their campaign would join Stein's recount efforts in that state and possibly others "in order to ensure the process proceeds in a manner that is fair to all sides.

President-elect Donald Trump issued a statement denouncing Stein's Wisconsin recount request saying, "The people have spoken and the election is over. District Judge Mark Goldsmith ordered a halt to the recount in Michigan on December 7, dissolving a previous temporary restraining order against the Michigan Board of Elections that allowed the recount to continue, stating in his order: Instead, they present speculative claims going to the vulnerability of the voting machinery — but not actual injury.

District Judge Paul Diamond rejected an appeal by the Green Party and Jill Stein to force a recount in Pennsylvania, stating that suspicion of a hacked Pennsylvania election "borders on the irrational" and that granting the Green Party's recount bid could "ensure that no Pennsylvania vote counts" given the December 13, , federal deadline to certify the vote for the Electoral College.

The recounts in Wisconsin and Nevada were completed on schedule, resulting in only minor changes to vote tallies. A subsequent state audit found no evidence of voter fraud and concluded that the mistakes, which were "almost entirely" caused by poll-worker mistakes attributed to poor training, did not impair "the ability of Detroit residents to cast a ballot and have their vote counted. Intense lobbying in one case involving claims of harassment and death threats [] and grass-roots campaigns have been directed at various GOP electors of the United States Electoral College [] to convince a sufficient number of them 37 to not vote for Trump, thus precluding a Trump presidency.

US to provide pro bono legal counsel as well as a secure communications platform for members of the Electoral College who are regarding a vote of conscience against Trump.

Williams castigated Democratic electors who had filed a lawsuit in Federal court to have the state law binding them to the popular vote in their case for Hillary Clinton overturned. On December 10, ten electors, in an open letter headed by Christine Pelosi to the Director of National Intelligence James Clapper , demanded an intelligence briefing [] [] in light of Russian interference in the election to help Trump win the presidency. On December 19, several electors voted against their pledged candidates: The th United States Congress officially certified the results on January 6, In the Electoral College vote on December 19, for the first time since , multiple faithless electors voted against their pledged qualified presidential candidate.

Likewise, for the first time since , [e] multiple faithless electors voted against the pledged qualified vice presidential candidate. Of the faithless votes, Colin Powell and Elizabeth Warren were the only two to receive more than one; Powell received three electoral votes for President and Warren received two for Vice President. Sanders is the first Jewish American to receive an electoral vote for President. LaDuke is the first Green Party member to receive an electoral vote, and Paul is the third member of the Libertarian Party to do so, following the party's presidential and vice-presidential nominees each getting one vote in It is the first election with faithless electors from more than one political party.

The seven people to receive electoral votes for president were the most in a single election since , and more than any other election since the enactment of the Twelfth Amendment in From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.

For related races, see United States elections, Presidential election results map. Numbers indicate electoral votes allotted to the winner of each state. United States presidential election. President of the United States. Business projects in Russia Election interference timeline Links of associates with Russian officials Steele dossier Trump Tower meeting Trump Tower wiretapping allegations Classified information disclosure Special Counsel investigation Republican Party presidential primaries, Republican Party presidential candidates, Republican Party vice presidential candidate selection, Democratic Party presidential primaries, Democratic Party presidential candidates, Democratic Party vice presidential candidate selection, Gary Johnson, Libertarian Party.

Jill Stein, Green Party. Evan McMullin presidential campaign, Darrell Castle, Constitution Party. United States third-party and independent presidential candidates, West Virginia [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] Independent Richard Duncan Real Estate Agent from Ohio Ricky Johnson Preacher from Pennsylvania 18 24, 0. Terranova 9 0. Sorenson 9 76 1, 0. Meyers 4 71 2, 0. Newspaper endorsements in the United States presidential election, Russian interference in the United States elections.

Democratic Party presidential debates and forums, ; Republican Party presidential debates and forums, ; Libertarian Party presidential debates and forums, ; and Green Party presidential debates and forums, United States presidential debates, University of Nevada Las Vegas.

Electoral vote—Vice President Pence. Total — 65,, Results by state, shaded according to winning candidate's percentage of the vote. Results by county, shaded according to winning candidate's percentage of the vote. Results of U. Results by county, shaded according to percentage of the vote for Trump. Results by county, shaded according to percentage of the vote for Clinton. Nationwide opinion polling for the United States presidential election, and Statewide opinion polling for the United States presidential election, Legend [] cable news network broadcast network Total television viewers 8: International reactions to the United States presidential election, Faithless electors in the United States presidential election, They lost respectively two and five votes to faithless electors.

Pence and Kaine lost one and five votes, respectively. Some states continued to allocate electors by legislative vote as late as Greeley still garnered three posthumous electoral votes which were subsequently dismissed by Congress.

President before election Barack Obama Democratic. Elected President Donald Trump Republican. Timeline General election debates Parties Polling national statewide by demographics international Newspaper endorsements primary general Russian interference Social media International reactions Electors Recounts Faithless electors.

Third party and independent candidates Libertarian Party primaries debates nominee convention Green Party primaries debates nominee convention Constitution Party primaries nominee Independents McMullin.

This article is part of a series about Donald Trump. Republican Party ticket, Chairman of The Trump Organization — Candidates in this section are sorted by reverse date of withdrawal from the primaries. Senator from Texas — present. Senator from Florida — present. CEO of Hewlett-Packard — Senator from Kentucky — present. Senator from Pennsylvania — Senator from South Carolina — present. This article is part of a series about Hillary Clinton.

Democratic Party ticket, Secretary of State — Senator from Virginia — present. Candidates in this section are sorted by date of withdrawal from the primaries. Senator from Vermont — present. Harvard Law professor — Senator from Virginia — July 26, 13,, votes. November 2, 4 write-in votes in New Hampshire. October 20, 2 write-in votes in New Hampshire. This article is part of a series about Gary Johnson. This article is part of a series about Bill Weld.

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